AWESOME first date....now what?

[VtecQueen]

I had an awesome first date on Monday with a guy I've been talking to for a couple weeks before. We hit it off right off the bat, we met up at 3pm and didn't part ways until 12 midnight. No sex, nothing of the sort actually, just went out to dinner and talked and listened to music! There was a kiss at the end, ok so one during the date and one at the end. But nothing suspect!

 

It was great! But now what do I do?? He sends me sweet text messages every morning, and he answers every time I call. I'm hoping we can have a 2nd date this weekend, but I don't know if I should just go for it and bring it up or wait and see if he brings it up. He's a really nice guy and I would love to get to know him and spend more time with him but I don't want my excitement to show to the point I scare him off!! I'm trying to remain calm, yesterday he sent a really sweet text in the morning but that was the only thing I heard from him all day.

 

I'm kinda tipping on a tightrope on should I make a move, or wait for him to make a move. Don't wanna be too forward but don't him to think I'm not interested. HELP!!!! Can't you tell him freaking out?? haha!

[superfox]

Text - 'oh I just heard the song '****' on the radio and it reminded me of when we heard it blah blah blah... Really looking forward to seeing you again sometime!'

[lavenderdove]

The biggest mistake people make in situations like this is letting their excitement run away with him. This guy is a nice *prospect* but you don't really know him at all or where this will end up, so don't expect him to act like he's your BF immediately.

 

If he's sending you nice messages that is great, but wait until he asks you out again... I frankly get uncomfortable if someone i just started dating expects to be in my business all day every day (i.e., you are worried that you 'only' got one text from him a day, but frankly, that is a lot when you hardly know the person). In the early stages of dating, you might only hear from the guy once or twice a week, or when he wants to set up another date.

 

He may be dating other people at this point too, checking out lots of people to decide who he might want to date more seriously. So don't let your excitement at hitting it off with him get confused with the expectation that he will be your BF, nor should you expect to get that level of attention and commitment at this point.

 

If you're texting every day I'm sure he knows you are interested, so if he doesn't ask you on a date for this weekend, it probably means he already has plans, or doesn't want to jump in too serious too soon, or might also be dating other girls (i.e., you're not exclusive). None of that is necessarily bad news, it just means that you want to jump in with both feet, and he might want to take it more slowly before he decides to get into exclusive/serious dating.

 

Look at him as someone you enjoy who *might* be more involved in your life or maybe not. Don't expect him to immediately act like a BF and spend tons of time with you either... you're just getting to know each other.

[VtecQueen]

Makes perfect sense! I know I know I'm trying think with my head and not my emotions and keep cool, like it was before we went on our date lol. Would it be too much to tell him I want to see him again?

[lavenderdove]

No, i think it is OK as long as you keep it light... if you really want to you could ask him to do something with you... tell him about a movie you really want to see or somewhere you really want to go and ask if he'd like to come with you... then tell him to pick a date/time when it's good for him.

 

But since you just went out on Monday, i'd wait and see if he asks you out again... he may have already had plans this weekend or think he's already had the 'date' for this week. Many people don't want to leap into seeing each other multiple times a week in the beginning because that goes too fast or has too many hidden expectations to it.

 

But if he doesn't ask you out again by the end of NEXT week, i'd just cool off a bit and not text him/call him everyday. Sometimes people will be polite and respond to text calls but have no real intention of dating you more, or of only really casually dating while they also date others, and you'll have to decide whether that is OK with you or not.

 

But it sounds good so far, just try to cool it a bit and not expect him to act like your BF and see you constantly yet.

[VtecQueen]

THANK YOU!!!!!!!!! That was awesome! Just what I needed to hear.