What to do, if anything?

[livestrong23]

I have a quick question, if anyone has any advice, let me know...thanks!

 

So I "met" someone via an online dating site recently. We exchanged emails back and forth, texts as well, and we were going to talk on the phone next. I was pretty excited as she seemed very "down to earth" and was similar to me in alot of ways and I thought a conversation would lead to a date etc...

 

Anyway, on the day we were supposed to talk, I got an email from her saying that she had met someone else on the dating site just before me so she was a little further along with him in the process and she is a "one man" girl and felt like she needed to see where that "connection" went before exploring myself and her. I respected that decision based on her morals and told her so. She said if she reached back out to me, she wanted to be completely available which I understood. Our email exchange was nice/flirty and even she even sent me a nice pic of herself so "I wouldn't forget her" and I promised to send a pic of myself in approx a month so that I had a "reason" to say hello which she said she would look forward to. And we left it at that about a week ago.

 

I didn't really have a chance to develop any feelings for her so I'm not upset/jealous or anything like that...however, it bums me out that I can't keep in contact because I think we may have really hit it off.

 

So is their anything I can do? I don't want to disrespect her decision as that will only hurt me in the long-run, however I keep thinking of excuses to keep in contact although I haven't acted on any of them. Should I? For example, a quick text or email just to say hi, was thinking about her, hope she is well etc...

 

Kind of stumped...any help would be great!

 

Thanks

 

Livestrong!

[DigitalSpy]

Just leave it. The harsh reality with online dating is that "chemistry" is tough to determine.

 

She has been talking a lot with you, and even longer with this other guy. So she knows a lot about each of you, unfortunately she has opted for the guy that looks better on paper. She literally chose between you two, and picked him. This does not mean that he is better suited, but at least right now he appears it! Just leave it, don't contact her any more.

 

If she contacts you, give it a shot. Its not like the real world where you were dropped for another guy, you have to be a little more leaneant with online dating, but yeah. For now I would just leave it, let her contact you if she ever wants to.

 

All the best mate!

 

What website was it?

[zaza34]

Online dating is a real jungle, but since she already chose somebody else, just leave it...

I can see her honesty of telling you about the other guy probably attracts you, because most of online daters just keep dating with several partners... I am sure she will contact you when/if she will be free and still will be considering giving your "relationship" a chance... but by not choosing you she already told you something... so why would like you to be her "plan B"???

[livestrong23]

Thanks and good advice Dspy, I feel like I was just "late to the game" which is very fair as she was further into the process with the other guy and wants to explore before going down a potentially uncomfortable road by juggling two of us and risking that neither would work out. I figure, she has to be about two months in with him so I figure if I will hear back from her sometime, it will be after at least another 2 months have passed once the honeymoon phase is over and she knows whether or not he is LTR material. Sucks to miss out on the opportunity by "just that much" but time will tell and if I am available when/if she reaches out, it's go time!

 

It was Match...

 

Livestrong!

[livestrong23]

Thanks zaza, yes, you are right with the on-line dating thing as I am living it right now for the first time...and it's a little crazy! And no, I would rather not be the plan B so by leaving it where it is, the "curiosity" will hopefully tell her to reach out if the relationship she is currently choosing to pursue doesn't work out. We didn't get far enough with our conversations for me to take it personally, so I have no hard feelings at all.

 

Livestrong!