older woman at work >

[derek_w]

Here is some history about me, an my situation.

 

I am 24, and manage a department here at work.

 

A women from one of our other offices (accross the street) started becoming very flirty with me. I asked her out to lunch, we went, and had a great time. No awkward moments, everything flowed. I was totally surprised because she is a complete knockout, definatly a 10 out of 10 (i am no slouch myself...). When lunch was over she gave me a hug, said she had a great time and said we should do this again. I've run into her a few more times and we're still very flirty. She always ends our conversations by looking straight at me and saying "it was very nice to see you again".

 

She wanted me to take me for a ride in my car again (a vintage bmw setup for track and autocross.. one of my hobbies is solo racing) and she also wanted me to drive her car to see how it felt (a lexus is300). I was in her office about to ask her on Monday, but the phone rang.. So I ended up sending an email. She said how about friday? Not sure if she meant during lunch, or after work. I still don't know. I'll find out soon So I'm going to see her again friday, sometime.

 

Now this is my dilemma - I have no idea how old she is, I think mid to early 30's. The other problem is, I think she thinks I am a little older than I am. She obviously knows I am at least a big younger than her, and has no problem with that. Hmm..

 

One more thing. I know she was living with a guy as of a few months ago, but one of my staff told me they broke up. She says she lives alone now. At our lunch she mentioned this guy, said they had gone out saturday. I don't understand this. Obviously their relationship degraded, because they dont live together anymore. And she obviously has something for me. I never feel comfortable asking a girl if she is seeing anyone, or what her situation is, and I would feel even less comfortable seeing as how she is older than me.

 

So, your thoughts? I'm a bit confused. Thanks

 

D

[brokenpogostick]

I think it would definitely be very beneficial for you to confront her about this other guy. There is no need to start anything if she's not going to give you 100% of her attention. You definitely don't want to be a rebound for her.

 

it does sound like things were going well, though - i'm happy for you. just dig a little deeper into the situation with this other guy & you'll find your answer

[Day_Walker]

first of all you have to establish what your intentions are with this female. Is she gf material or are you going to mess around with her. DO NOT confront her about this other dude, it is not any of your concern then you seem OVERLY interested, which will turn her off. Keep the situation the way it is, be friendly with her and see what develops. If you see her as gf material and you find out that she is with another guy then you know. Females will usually offer information about bfs (or whatever) without having to ask for it. If she hasnt mentioned anything then you're good to go. If you do happen to see her as gf material DO NOT mention anything about the way you feel about her or that you want to get with her. So to recap, keep it friendly (play it cool), enjoy the moment and make no plans for the future and you will be fine.

[goddess23]

i agree with day about playing it cool with this girl. asking her about this guy is completely un necessary. if she was in a relationship then shes completely leading you on going on lunch dates and being really flirty with you.

 

about your "dilemma", you said you're 24, say shes at the most 33, thats not much of an age difference considering the points you both are in in your lives. and im surprised you guys havnt brought up age already, but it really isnt a dilemma, it is something that you should bring up in the next "date" casually. like "you look so young to be working here, how old are you?" or something! honestly an age differencfe like that is nothing to worry about and if she does end up having a problem with it then obviously it wouldnt work out. at least your at a state in the relationship where if it "ends" now it wont be too bad. so just bring it up somehow, or even ask her if she has a bf, but just dont ask specifically about that guy. there are other ways like "so where do you live?", and conversation will naturally flow. im starting to wonder what exactly you guys DID talk about lol. but ya, its not a big deal, dont stress about it, as long as you're fine with it, all thats left is to let it be brought up naturally and casually. if she does have a problem, it will be clear.

[brokenpogostick]

I'm just saying that he should ask her about him so he doesn't get played if he's wanting a serious relationship with her down the road.