Einah1281 Posted January 8, 2011 Share Posted January 8, 2011 I don't know how many of you have been following my post but I recieved a text from my ex thursday night saying that one of his friends saw me at church the sunday. I didn't respond to his text till yesterday during my lunch break. Ex: (friends name) said he saw you at chruch on sunday Me: Really?....I think I saw him too Ex: Did you say hello? Me: I saw him from a distance. I didn't get a chance to speak because my mother was waiting for me. Ex is the new job? me: great Ex: Aight. Later. So I'm thinking "ok....I probably won't hear from him for awhile" and "What was that all about??" So later on tonight I awoke from my nap to see a another text from him: Ex: So (friends name) tells me that you got thin or lost some inches. (I respond 2 hrs after his text) Me Ex is what he said. I will have to see for myself one day. Me been working out. Ex: Good. So have I. I started P90x Ex in my living room Me really...thats good. Ex I am going to bed. Peace out. Me He texts and hour later: Ex would invite you over, but that would be a bad idea Me will meet up someplace one day Ex Maybe not. I may be on lock down with someone. (here comes the fumes from the top of my head) Me Ex of haha...did you buy Israel's cd? Me brought it for me... Ex: Good. Alright I have a long weekend ahead of me. I am going to sleep forreal this time. Me: Ok...gn. Now I am wondering why would he bring up seeing me one day..but when I brought it up he tells me (in so many words) he is seeing somebody?? What does he want?? I am really confused by his actions. I'm tee'd off...and I want to cry Did he try to get a rise out of me??? Is he playing games with me?? What did I do wrong?? Link to comment
The_Seeker Posted January 8, 2011 Share Posted January 8, 2011 i FEEL like he is. If he keeps this up, I call him out on it. "Look. I hate short conversations. Hate to break that to you. If you don't have anything to say please do not contact me. Peace out!" Link to comment
Mustachio Posted January 8, 2011 Share Posted January 8, 2011 Well I dont know your story, but this sounds like game playing, he is looking to see if you are still there for him if he happens to want you. It sounds like he may have someone else, but things either arent serious or arent going well and he wants a little bit of comfort from something he knows. Again without knowing your story I would say just be careful because if you do end up over there you are liable to find him inviting one minute then throwing you out the next. Link to comment
johnm3 Posted January 8, 2011 Share Posted January 8, 2011 looks like he was trying to incite some jealousy. poor insecure guy Link to comment
Einah1281 Posted January 8, 2011 Author Share Posted January 8, 2011 Well I dont know your story, but this sounds like game playing, he is looking to see if you are still there for him if he happens to want you. It sounds like he may have someone else, but things either arent serious or arent going well and he wants a little bit of comfort from something he knows. Again without knowing your story I would say just be careful because if you do end up over there you are liable to find him inviting one minute then throwing you out the next. Well we dated for 4.5 months. knew each other 2 year prior to us dating. He broke up with me in july. He really never broke contact with me. I went NC when he started to date another chick. When he tried to contact me again...I didn't respond. About a month ago he tells me things didn't workout with the other chick because she was "psycho". He asked me out to dinner..I declined because I had other plans. I still think he is rather salty about me not going to dinner with him. So it does seem to me he is pulling out all stops to let me know he won't be on the market for long....I really don't understand. Link to comment
Annamary Posted January 8, 2011 Share Posted January 8, 2011 Sounds like he wants to make you jealous...keep it cool girl! Let him play his games... Stay strong! I love your quote by the way! "Sometimes we tend to be in despair when the person we love leaves us, but the truth is, it's not our loss, but theirs, for they left the only person who wouldn't give up on them." Link to comment
Einah1281 Posted January 8, 2011 Author Share Posted January 8, 2011 Sounds like he wants to make you jealous...keep it cool girl! Let him play his games... Stay strong! I love your quote by the way! "Sometimes we tend to be in despair when the person we love leaves us, but the truth is, it's not our loss, but theirs, for they left the only person who wouldn't give up on them." Thanks...I got the quote off of some website. Call me naive but if he claims to be soo over me why the games?? Why try to make me jealous? Link to comment
zimbabalooba Posted January 8, 2011 Share Posted January 8, 2011 I believe it is fairly simple, as guys generally are. He is seeing someone. He texted you as his friend didn't say you've lost some inches. He said you look good and you must be working out. Upon hearing this, he has thought he isn't able to take advantage of this changed you, and has tried to assert himself in some way. What is interesting is that because of this, he values you (and the new you - in his head) as more than his current. Otherwise he simply would not have texted. My advice. Your texts were perfect and nice, leave them like that. He doesn't know what he wants and thats not your problem, but his. Link to comment
Annamary Posted January 8, 2011 Share Posted January 8, 2011 I believe it is fairly simple, as guys generally are. He is seeing someone. He texted you as his friend didn't say you've lost some inches. He said you look good and you must be working out. Upon hearing this, he has thought he isn't able to take advantage of this changed you, and has tried to assert himself in some way. What is interesting is that because of this, he values you (and the new you - in his head) as more than his current. Otherwise he simply would not have texted. My advice. Your texts were perfect and nice, leave them like that. He doesn't know what he wants and thats not your problem, but his. I agree with Zimba... Some guys just like to play games and see how you still feel about them.....don't play along...his problem not yours! Link to comment
Einah1281 Posted January 8, 2011 Author Share Posted January 8, 2011 I believe it is fairly simple, as guys generally are. He is seeing someone. He texted you as his friend didn't say you've lost some inches. He said you look good and you must be working out. Upon hearing this, he has thought he isn't able to take advantage of this changed you, and has tried to assert himself in some way. What is interesting is that because of this, he values you (and the new you - in his head) as more than his current. Otherwise he simply would not have texted. My advice. Your texts were perfect and nice, leave them like that. He doesn't know what he wants and thats not your problem, but his. This has crossed my mind too. Even though i'm a lil hurt that he is seeing someone else. I wanna check his FB soooo bad...lol! Link to comment
zimbabalooba Posted January 8, 2011 Share Posted January 8, 2011 Its only natural to be hurt and inquisitive. They're normal feelings. Don't check his facebook, as if it wasn't there you couldn't. Facebook are advertisements of people and their personalities. If he is feeling insecure, which it sounds like he is, his "advertisement" will be directed at you and the promotion of himself as not being insecure. From what I have read from your posts here, you seem like an incredible person. Your replies to his texts etc and the wording of the question on here really show an incredible humility. Something which is very rare in people. If this wasn't a forum but a cafe, I would be ordering another round and wanting to know more! Link to comment
zimbabalooba Posted January 8, 2011 Share Posted January 8, 2011 Its only natural to be hurt and inquisitive. They're normal feelings. Don't check his facebook, as if it wasn't there you couldn't. Facebook are advertisements of people and their personalities. If he is feeling insecure, which it sounds like he is, his "advertisement" will be directed at you and the promotion of himself as not being insecure. From what I have read from your posts here, you seem like an incredible person. Your replies to his texts etc and the wording of the question on here really show an incredible humility. Something which is very rare in people. If this wasn't a forum but a cafe, I would be ordering another round and wanting to know more! Link to comment
Einah1281 Posted January 8, 2011 Author Share Posted January 8, 2011 Its only natural to be hurt and inquisitive. They're normal feelings. Don't check his facebook, as if it wasn't there you couldn't. Facebook are advertisements of people and their personalities. If he is feeling insecure, which it sounds like he is, his "advertisement" will be directed at you and the promotion of himself as not being insecure. From what I have read from your posts here, you seem like an incredible person. Your replies to his texts etc and the wording of the question on here really show an incredible humility. Something which is very rare in people. If this wasn't a forum but a cafe, I would be ordering another round and wanting to know more! Haha...thanks Him and I are no longer FB friends. I deleted him 2 days after the BU, however my mother and a couple of my friends are still connected to him on FB. So for my own sanity I won't be checking his page, I already feel like a ton of bricks has fell on me. Link to comment
Annamary Posted January 8, 2011 Share Posted January 8, 2011 This has crossed my mind too. Even though i'm a lil hurt that he is seeing someone else. I wanna check his FB soooo bad...lol! Einah your not that desperate...YOUR NOT! Let him wonder about how YOU are doing! Link to comment
lavenderdove Posted January 8, 2011 Share Posted January 8, 2011 OK, this is actually quite clear... His friend told him he saw you and you had lost some weight and looked really hot... he started thinking, hmmm, i might want to sample some of that new hotness... BUT he is 'on lockdown' (i.e., has a GF now), so he texts you to start a flirty exchange to see if you MIGHT agree to see him for some sex even though he now has a GF... he'll probably work up to it with a flirty exchange like this, then ask you to meet with him eventually and his agenda will be SEX on the side without his GF knowing while you think maybe he wants to get back with you. Really, why are you messing with this guy? He flits from girl to girl and contacts you to flirt with him while he is with someone else? I don't think he's ready for a real GF at this point in his life, and may be a serial cheater who just likes to keep different women on the hook at the same time. Link to comment
Einah1281 Posted January 8, 2011 Author Share Posted January 8, 2011 Now one thing I can say about my ex is that he is far from a cheater. I've known him 2 years prior to us dating and when he is really serious about somebody he is focused on that person...nobody else. What I found out about him this morning is the girl he might be on "lockdown with" is some chick that he is going out on a date with for the first time tonight. Which I kinda figured that because he wouldn't have contacted me if he was in a serious relationship with the girl. I will agree with you on him maybe seeing how far I'd go with him and when I didn't give in to his advances he tried to make me jealous...thats typical him. Link to comment
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