lol is it posible to be too nice

[wing wha]

lol hi i have been here a while and helped people out and i have got help. i am pretty much always happy. i dont get good grades im going to summer school. i really dont have to many friends and i dont have a girl. but iam happy. people have told me your nice. but never like a girl in person. im very shy but very nice. do girls like shy nice guys. i m trying to stay positive. i know im only 15 but girls never talk to me. i m very relaxed when talking to guys. i have problems with girls though. even if its a simple "hey you dropped your pencil". will a girl approach me or is that sort of guys sort of thing. maybe girls like bad guys it certainly seems that way. im 80 pounds going in to sophmore. i know girls like guys that weigh about 100 pounds more then they do. so im the lighest. any body like this nervous but nice positive and the small guy.

[RagingGecko]

It certainly seems that girls like the "bad guys." What you think of as being sweet will often come off to a girl as being desperate or a pushover, especially at your age. It's really tough for guys to know where to draw the line, trust me, I know from experience.

[Gilgamesh]

Girs like go after the "bad boys" for one simple reason, they have confidence and are not shy. the bad boys dont have a problem with going up to a girl and talking to them, and if they get rejected they dont care, they got the nerve to hit on their sister. they dont get bent out of shape.

 

You see, your a nice guy, and you dont want to look like your out to get them, but guess what, girls like guys and they expect them to want them. so stop worrying about looking like a hunter, dont be ashamed of being a man and going after what you want and need. I am not saying you should be rude, lie or be a player. you can still be a good guy, but emulate a man that is confident in his self, and who is not shy about what he is after.

 

If you try to be the nice guy buddy boy with women, your going to end up with a whole lot of female friends and no girlfriends. they will come crying to you everytime they have problems with the bad boy jerk that hurt them and will ask you for help getting back with that guy. I know I been there.

 

So stop making excuses about your weight, or any of that, you need to have confidence and courage, if you need to feel good about yourself then join a gym or something but that in itself isnt the problem, the problem is how you aproach girl, or the way you dont aproach them.

[RagingGecko]

If you try to be the nice guy buddy boy with women, your going to end up with a whole lot of female friends and no girlfriends. they will come crying to you everytime they have problems with the bad boy jerk that hurt them and will ask you for help getting back with that guy. I know I been there.

 

Wow, you just summed up most of my dating career right there.

 

Take Gilgamesh's advice. If you want friends, treat them like friends, if you want a girlfriend, you're going to have to have the confidence to ask.

[JasonQ]

Gig,

 

Your advice is amazing. Of all advice i have read, yours always seems to make sense to me. It really makes me WANT to try your advice, but in the end, i am still a chicken.

 

Not trying to hijack this thread, but maybe sometime i could catch you on IM or something.

 

I think my problem is that i over-analyze everything. Like i was saying in the other thread (about asking a girl where she got her shoes) I just think too hard about what the girl would think. I think about how cheezy stuff seems to me, and think it would apply to them. I have no confidence whatsoever, but really want to talk to girls. They dont need to be girlfriends (yet ) just someone i can get to know, so later i can try to make a relationship. I have no problems talking to girls i dont "LIKE" but those that i find remotely attractive and i like, then i cant talk to them, even if my life would depend on it....