decided to break up with girlfriend > quick question...

[derek_w]

I've decided to break up with my gf of 2 years. My reasons are valid, mainly because we have grown apart and are at different stages in our lives, but this isn't the thread for that. I have plans to see her on the weekend sometime. I am eager to break up with her, so I can get on with my life. Should I just wait until I planned on seeing her next, or demand that she make time for me tonight or tomorrow. I think if I demanded that she make time for me, because we need to talk, she may get spooked. I'm probably waiting until the weekend, but I need someone to back me up (or prove me wrong..) or give any other advice.

 

Thanks ya'll

 

 

-d

[lady00]

it's best to break up in person and be honest. you can tell her in advance that you want to talk to her about the relationship when you next meet.

[konfuzed505]

Hi Derek,

I am brand new to this and have just posted a question myself, so I don't know how good my advice will be... lol.. but I'll give it a shot.

If you are planning on waiting until the weekend, you have a long hard week ahead of you. Do you talk to her everyday? If so, it will be weird for you and she will pick up in your voice that something is wrong. Only you know the depth of your relationship and if it is better to do it now than to wait. However, if I were in her situation, I would rather my boyfriend call me now instead of waiting. The reason is she will be excited to see you only to be left hurt and confused. If you call her and ask (not demand) if you could see her tonight - or tomorrow - or whenever, sure she will know something is wrong, but will be maybe be a little prepared that she is about to get bad news. If you know in your heart of hearts that this is what you want, don't prolong it. It will only hurt you both more. By this weekend you will have your speech memorized and it may come accross as cold. In my opinion, it would be better to tell her now that this has been on your mind and that this is what you want than to wait. Just be sure to speak from your heart and be as honest as possible. Most people can deal with the harsh reality of things if they know the truth. It's the not knowing that can drive you insane...

 

Good luck!

[derek_w]

Thanks. I actually called her just now, unfortunately she knew something was wrong when i said we had to meet soon and demanded I told her. I didn't want to break up over the phone but that's how it dropped. We were together for 2 years. Feels good to have done it.

 

peace,

 

d

[konfuzed505]

Glad you feel better now. In person would have been nice, but on the phone probably made it easier. At least you did try to talk to her in person.... Now this week will be easier for you and she can begin a healing process of her own.

 

Take care!