Questions for the love- shy men and women

[pcmodemtcg]

here goes:

 

1) When you are feeling shy, anxious, nervous etc. and you can't make eye contact or even be around the person you are really attracted to do you want them to approach you or talk to you?

I would honestly suspect that it was some kind of trick as I cannot bring myself to believe that anyone would do that. If I honestly cant even like myself, I cant believe anyone else would either.

 

Do you wish they'd initiate, make a move, ask you out, etc? Even when you are at your most anxious and scared..and possibly avoident?

Again, I wish I could trust it, but I would most likely be too terrified to accept. The fantasy side of me would love to be asked out, but I know its not going to happen.

 

Or is best they leave you alone and give you space due to the anxiety and fear being so overwhelming?

Sadly, this is probably best although I wish it wasnt the case. Doesnt matter anyway, no woman is going to do it.

 

2) How are you with phone calls, texts, emails, etc.?

Barely get any. but unless it is in a workplace where I have been able to fake it before, I am not very good with any of that.

 

If a woman or man you really liked alot gave an email address or number to you..could you make a move then (not face to face) but say with a phone call? If not why?

I doubt it. I cant see anyone ever doing that to me and would be suscpicious of it.

 

3) If you were trying to get yourself ''psyched'' to ask her/him out on a date..say on a Friday before the weekend, would you be overly nervous or anxious..excited even thinking about doing that OR would you be more withdrawn, avoident, frightened due to fear of possible rejection, etc.?

Have not asked anyone on a date in about 15 years, so no idea, but I doubt I can ask anyone out. Pretty sure I would not be able to do it or would come of like a moron.

 

4) How difficult is it to tell a person you are attracted to (and want to date) how you truly feel about them on a scale of 1-10? Would it be embarrassing to let them know..to SHOW them how you felt? Could you show them?

not sure where the scale goes to, but if 10= most difficult than I am an 11. I could not ever tell anyone how I feel truly. I cant even look at most people anyway, so we are really in the realm of fantasy here for me.

 

Would you care what others thought or feel it would be inappropriate (in your mind) to share such feelings...if so, why???

I would most likely feel that after the girl rejected me, which is a certainty, that she would tell all of her friends.

[vitaminX]

Hi everyone,

 

I'll try to make this quick. I've known my best friend for 8 years--we met in college. He's only been in one relationship and it was on-and-off. He's always been reserved and shy but I never thought anything of it. He never had a problem socializing with anyone, I just assumed he didn't date after his relationship because he never found "the one." Upon doing more research on the condition, however, he admitted to having all of the traits associated with love shyness and incel. We've been getting alot closer lately--he's alot more open with me about things and we've been seeing alot more of each other (he lives 5 hours away, so it hasn't always been easy). In fact, we just got back from a three-week trip abroad. Everytime I thought we were getting somewhere, everytime we'd have a 'moment' or some spark, he would become withdrawn and cold. He was at times obviously flirtatious but would suddenly push me away before giving me the opportunity to respond. I really like him and I don't want to ruin our friendship if my feelings are one-sided. I also don't want to push him outside of his comfort zone. How do I approach this? How can you tell if a love shy male likes you??

 

Thanks for any input!

[SometimesShy]

--but in all reality the guy usually does the pursuing from the first moment..heavily. Thats what woman are use to and thats how MOST men seem to be and what they are willing to do to be happy.

 

100 percent true for Non-Shy men. 100 percent false for shy men. Many shy men cannot make the first move, not ever, so they usually end up with women that are able to make the first move. And by "first move" I mean that these women are direct and almost blunt about making the first move. Nothing subtle about their behavior at all.

 

In the end its all about what you are willing to do?

 

For shy men it is about what they are able to do, and many shy men are not able to make the first move.

[RitaTrue]

Ooooh, questions! My answers are in blue.

No problem. I like questions!