A player...maybe??

[Triple444]

Hi, could a fairly shy/reserved guy be a player? Could the shyness be a facade of sorts? Also, how would I know for sure if someone is a player or not?

 

Info on the guy: Very nice/sweet and can have a conversation with anyone really. He's not loud/arrogant but very quiet and reserved - I have not seen him interact with any other females but me, mainly due to the fact that 100% of the people employed on his section are men.

[iJester]

I'm low key and reserved and I've been accused of this before. I'm genuinely interested in learning about people and I think it's that interest that makes women attached quickly. I get accused of being a player when I stop talking to them after sleeping together for a few weeks, though I've actually made them no promises or commitment. All it really takes to get a lot of girls in bed is attention and affection, and anyone that realizes this can exploit it however they want, whether reserved or boisterous.

 

What makes you think he's a player?

[Batya33]

I think that typically if an adult man is interested in dating you and available to date he will ask you out. Most people who are friendly or flirt but are not interested or available to date are no players - flirting is fun, nothing wrong with it unless the person knows he is leading on the other person because the other person told him or her she wanted to date or have a romantic relationship. It could be this guy doesn't want to date a co-worker. If you do date him you will know he is trustworthy and genuine if he acts that way - calls when he says he will, treats you with respect and is otherwise reliable. It sounds like you are starting from a place of extreme distrust and that is strange - doesn't he deserve a chance to get to know you without being under this much suspicion?

[Triple444]

Thanks for your input. I am not a co-worker, he is a client as well as those who work on the section. A close colleague of his told me about the existence of a girlfriend in his life (although no one has met her), yet the colleague admits that this guy is smitten with me What the colleague didn't realise was that we went on our first date today and he asked me on a second before the first was over. I would not distrust someone unless they give me good reason to.

 

I have been getting to know him over a period of months - he is truly one of the nicest people I have ever met, so the fact that we had a date and there could be a gf in the picture, just doesn't add up!! One final thing, the guy would know for certain that I am no easy person when it comes to sleeping with - it will not happen as I do not believe in premarital sex.