don't know how to kiss

[redfire]

hey, i'm 19 and i have never been kissed before, there is this guy that i really like and i think that he wants to kiss me, but every time he tries i duck and start giggling i don't know what to do. i'm kinda imature when it comes to things like this for the simple reason that i have never done any of it before. please help. and some advice on kissing would be nice to. thank you

[swift44]

hey uh, you can only learn by trying it, it aint that hard trust me, just try it and youll learn dont worry

[enchanter]

Be gentle dont rush or anything, it coul dmake it awkward. I think soft and slow is good for just kissing your boyfriend or girlfriend. Or at least a nice way to start until you find out how you prefer to kiss.

 

Try to keep it dry, I kissed one guy who was a horrible kisser, and made you feel sort of nasty.

 

Try not to rush and force because I dont think its a good place to start.

 

Try not to sweat it, it comes naturally really.

[Gilgamesh]

It is easy, next time he tries, just extend the lower part of your face a bit, and tilt a bit too one side, I usually close my eyes at moment of contact.

 

For starts, just let your lips gently touch. when he pulls away, you can look into his eyes and smile.

 

Since you have pulled away a few times, the poor guy may be thinking you dont like him "that way" if he brings it up, just tell him you want to but are just shy. So as to ease is doubts, if he has them.

[ShroudedSorrow24]

yeah, if you keep pulling away from this guy hes going to think that you don't feel that way about him. Kissing is really easy, it basically comes natural. When your lips touch you'll know what to do. Just do what you feel and good luck!

[cabralsoth]

all i can say is DONT WORRY... he is a guy, he could care less how good you are, more than likely he will just be to much in awe that he is finally kissing you that he will wonder if HE is doing good enough... let him lead, and it pretty much just happens. if you dont like how he is doing it, well, you know what you dont like....lol... the only real thing you have to worry about is the ever elusive 'teeth click'...lol.. i hate it when my teeth hit against thiers, this usually only really happens when 2 people of different styles of making out try and kiss, or you are nervous, or just a simple accident..lol. but really, dont worry, slip a lil tongue in and out of his mouth teasingly, suck a little lip (not hard, that can cause swelling) and dont keep your eyes all the way open, that just freaks me out...lol.

[redfire]

thanks for the advice guys, but, when he tried to kiss me again he kinda caught me by surprise and i ducked out of the way. but i'm starting to wonder if this guy even likes me or is just playing with my feelings, he never askes me out, doesn't really know that much about me, and tells me stuff that i find very discoraging like today he told me that he likes girls that are light skined, have hazel eyes, instead of the usuall brown, skinny long hair and pretty feet. i only fit one of those criterias, but he also told me that i was beautiful and that i had a cute smile, great body. he is really confusing me. lately he's been talking about sex and inviting me to have some with him, i'm a virgin and i told him this, every time he makes some kind of reference to sex with him i always tell him no because, he wants the sex without the relationship and i just don't want to do that. i'm really confused i really like this guy, he is really sweet and those references to sex he made seem to have been made jokingly but i don't know how to tell when he is serious and when he is joking.today he had touched me alot not in inappropriat ways, i mean like trying to hold my hands, hugging me . i don't quite know what to make of him, i want to go out with him, and i have invited him a few times to hang out with me and usally he has an escuse to why he can't go, and i'm just tired of being rejected like that, so i'm really afraid to ask him agian. he knows that i like him i told him. but he hasn't really made a move. did i mention that we work togeter, and usally he see's me in my work uniform. a few days after i told him that i liked him i had to go to work without my uniform so i got dressed up to impress you know, and apparently it made an impression on him because that is when he started ackting like he wanted to get to know me better before that, he just kind saw me as the girl who he worked with. becuase of the sex questions i'm wondering if he respects me as a person, cause i don't think that someone who liked a girl and respected her would make such references over and over again. he's a really cool person which is why i like him so he doesn't make the work environment uncomfortable for me. but he does make me wonder weather i should just give up on him and admit defeat. i'm tired of w ondering around tring to establish a realationship when i don't really know how he feels. so quiting seems like a really great idea right now. please give me some advice.

[cabralsoth]

hey redfire, i thought you all were going out..lol.. he is probably finding your shyness attractive, even challanging... i wouldnt be surprised if the less interest you show in him all of a sudden causes him to want you more... it is true that guys usually judge a woman by different clothes, as though it has something to do with who they are i work in a bank, and for some reason when i see the girls at work i think of them as professional and not into the stuff i like, but i have hung out outside of work with a few of them, and when i see them in their home get up it sends a complete different image in my head..lol.. it is not right, but it does happen... he prolly saw you natural and totally dug the look, you are no longer 'just the girl he works with' you are some chick he would check out if he was with his guy friends...lol. but maybe the reason he doesnt want to actually go out with you may be to an insecurity with himself... has he dated before? do you know of other girls he has gone out with? he may be shy, but with you acting more shy than him is giving him the courage to be daring... thats just one to grow on..lol. it is really hard to draw a conclusion from these situations simply for the fact that all we get is the one persons view point.

[Gilgamesh]

Ding Ding Ding RED FLAG Warning Warning Will Robinson OK that last part is before your time lol.

 

Girl you have good instincts, no wonder you didn't feel right about kissing this guy, because there is something inside you thats yelling NO WAY.

 

You are right about being "discouraged" by him, in one hand he tells you the kind of girl he likes (not like you) here are possible motives: 1) It makes you feel lucky that he finds you attractive even though your not his type, 2) You feel insecure and will work harder not to lose him. 3) He is just an Insensitive Jerk. Id say he not smart enough for #1 and #2, so most likely its #3

 

lately he's been talking about sex and inviting me to have some with him

 

Well he doesn't beet around the bush here, its obvious what he is after.

 

every time he makes some kind of reference to sex with him i always tell him no because, he wants the sex without the relationship and i just don't want to do that

 

Good for you, !!! you should NEVER do anything you are not ready for, all this guy wants is to score, he is a player, and a really bad one at that. I am amazed you even talk to him.

 

You will not change him OK, you cannot fix him into a better person, he does not love you, or respect you, all he is thinking about is himself and how he is going to get what he wants. I assume the guy is a knock out or popular in school or you wouldn't try so hard hoping he will someday become a nice guy, that wont happen anytime soon!

 

don't quite know what to make of him, i want to go out with him, and i have invited him a few times to hang out with me and usually he has an excuse to why he can't go,

 

This makes you want him even more doesn't it, sweaty this is what "players" do. its even in book on how to be a player!!! If he really liked you and was as sweet as he wants you to believe, he would answer your calls.

 

usually he See's me in my work uniform. a few days after i told him that i liked him i had to go to work without my uniform so i got dressed up to impress you know, and apparently it made an impression on him because that is when he started acting like he wanted to get to know me better

 

Read that for yourself again, do you see it? so basically he didn't really like you for who you are, but throw something sexy on and bam he all lovey Dovey. Is that what you want him to like you for?

 

I'm wondering if he respects me as a person, cause i don't think that someone who liked a girl and respected her would make such references over and over again

 

Bingo!!!

 

he's a really cool person which is why i like him so

 

Don't fall in love with cool. thats his tool of choice. cool cannot substitute for Kindness, respect, manners, maturity, or any of the goos traits you want in a boyfriend.

 

but he does make me wonder weather i should just give up on him and admit defeat.

 

Defeat???? So thats how you feel? if you cannot get a player to want you for yourself then its considered defeat? no, its not your fault he is a jerk OK, Your value as a person is not based on your ability to make someone something he is not!

 

so quiting seems like a really great idea right now

 

Here you go again, acting like a failure, when you should be patting yourself on the back for finding a phony, he was trying to use you, understand? he doesn't care about your feelings or who you are, your a target something to conquer! consider yourself a winner!!!! you came accross a player, your BS sensors told you something was wrong and you left.

 

You are a winner!!

[sumimasen]

I'm with Gilamesh here.

Even though I'm careful about judging people based on descriptions this one is a giveaway.

 

Think about it, he's acting and talking like a total insensitive jerk.