i wanna cry!!!

[AngelOfDarknes]

hi, help me i feel like i wanna cry!!! my bf dosent understand me, he has a girl thats a friend and she sat on his lap,but i feel so mad i feel like if he does that he might do more i didnt see them do that, he told me that what he did, and we alomst brokeup cuzz he said if i dont exept his friends then we cant be together. it hurts so much but i said ill try to be friends with her,and he dosent want to lose his friends either i feel like he does not care about me what should i do any advice if this how it suppose to be should i let him be with her and trust him or break it off....?

[1Adam12]

You should tell your BF you are not comfortable with her being so 'close' to him so to speak and that he needs to tell his friend this as well.

 

Seems like she may be trying to get a little bit closer btwn the two of you who knows..

 

You can PM me if u need anymore help

 

Phillip

[Celadon]

Sorry you're feeling upset. You know, some people don't understand that there are boundaries to friendship, but there are. You're right to be uncomfortable with his flirty friend. Dating relationships aren't about letting anyone do whatever they want to you, they're about establishing something special and unique between two people.

 

Don't act jealous of her. Just act like he's yours, which he is. Ask him to respect you and your relationship by NOT allowing her to get so close to him. Her flirting is crossing the line, imho.

 

Meanwhile, make a real effort to get to know his friends. Go out with him and her and get to know her better. That can only boost you in his eyes.

 

But if he refuses to respect your wishes after you've talked with him and made an effort, then, yeah, is the relationship really worth hanging around for? Good luck.

[dave1977]

I know exactly how you feel. i had the same situation but with a girl of course. There was one guy she was close friends with and they always sat close, hugged, and touched occasionally. She swore it was innocent and the was nothing between them. But it was burning inside me and i couldnt overlook it. It would ruin many nights for me and i would go home and stew over it, lose sleep, and it made me anxious.

what you have to do is tell him that you want him too keep his friends and be close because that is important. But if he wants to be with you there has to be a line drawn. Things do change when people get involved in a relationship and he has to learn that. You have to tell him how it makes you feel. If he really loves you and respects you he will listen and pay more attention to those things. I dont know how old he is or anything about his history with girls but if he doesn't want to listen to you and come to a compromise, maybe he isn't good for you. Many young guys have trouble with commitment. I wish you the best and i hope things do work out

[summerdreams]

i really don't think it's that big a deal...if you trust your bf, you should know he won't cross the lines and cheat on you.

[Dreng3333]

Personally I think two things:

 

1. You might be blowing this out of proportion just a little but.

 

2. You need to talk to him about it.

 

 

Sometimes it can be completely harmless if a girl sits on a guys lap, and sometimes not. But either way I think you should talk to him about it and just say that its ok for him to have friends that are girls, but that there is a line to be drawn somewhere.

 

If he is worth going out with, he will understand

[AngelOfDarknes]

well thxs for all your replys

 

 

well i did try to talk to him but he still didnt understand me still...so the next day we hangout again he brought her...then he droped me off store so i can pick up somethings.....after a long day he droped her off home then we to my house. then he said we need to talk about us i said okay. he wanted to breakup, cuzz he said that his not ready to have a relationship, cuzz of his recent breakup...im so heart broken and confused if he wasnt ready why start it in the first place, i feel so sick its hard to breath even.

should i understand him be just friends or never talk to him again?

[Celadon]

Angel, sorry to hear this!

 

I think you *may* be friends with him in a little while, but right now, just protect yourself and don't have any contact with him. It'll hurt less in the long run. You can get involved in other things, and hang out with other people now.

 

It wasn't fair of him to start dating you if he wasn't ready. If you're mad at him, I don't blame you at all. He probably found you attractive, though, and thought he might be emotionally ready (only to find out he's not). It's better for you to know what the score is, so you can move on with your life and find a guy who's ready and wants what you want.

 

For now, take it easy. Let it be. Get together with your other friends for company. I hope you feel better and that life brings you good things.

[brokenpogostick]

what a jerk! first of all, he shouldn't have had that chick on his lap friends or not...that's just insensitive...what would he have thought if you would have sat on another guys lap??? i think it's prolly for the better that the relationship is over. you can find a much much better guy that won't do that to you at all.