TORN BETWEEN EX LOVER AND NEW LOVER

[Rooster1616]

Hi..I am stuck between a rock and a hard place and could use some good neutral advice..

I am currently dating someone for about 2 months..we totally get along great...i adore her..she is good to me...etc...however, an ex who i was totally in love with, who wasn't ready for the feelings she had for me has suddenly reappeared..she is now saying i am ready..i want a relationship..etc...

i don't know what to do..i want them both..but i know that can't happen..i need to choose..but i can't seem to...they both get to me in different ways..and i connect with them both in very different ways...with the current gf i see a steady, loving, caring relationship and i love that..i love being with her..and the sex is great....with the ex i see passion, excitement, yet i don't feel as secure..but gosh how i have waited for her to say she loves me...but we have never had sex.so obviously the curiosity is there for me..BIG TIME!! i could see myself with both of them..but in two totally different relationships..i just don't know which one i want..

any advice..i am completely confused.. or anyone been in a similar situation

thank you very much for all your help..

[roo1oo]

That's a very tough situation. Maybe the best thing to do is to make a pro's and con's list. I know it sounds simple, but if you feel that you need to make a choice, it can maybe point your mind in the right direction. One thing I can say about the ex is if she left you once, or wasn't ready for the feelings once, she may leave again. You've already dealt with your feelings for her and getting over her, and do you want to do it again? I have a good friend who was in a somewhat similar situation, except that there was no current girlfriend involved. His ex, who tore his heart in two, begged him to take her back. He claimed they had had a serious talk about what they did and didn't like about their relationship before and how they would change their relationship in the future. They are also 1,000 miles away from eachother now, so kudos to them for making it work.

 

I think you really need to thik about who is the person who fits with your life better. Maybe even make a list of the qualities of the perfect girlfriend and see who's qualities match up to that. Shoot, you could even ask your friends what they think about each girl. I know other peoples opinions shouldn't matter, but your friends can be the best, unbiased judges of peoples true intentions.

 

Good luck!