Can't understand what I did wrong?

[Ladywithlove]

I recently met this guy online .We chatted for a week or two and then agreed to meet for coffee.Online and in person we really hit it off .We ended up sitting and talking for an hour and a half .When I got home we talked some more and he asked me out so I told him the Friday would be good if it wasn't to soon,we were Monday .He said sure .We agreed on a time and that he would pick me up . Wednesday came around and I hadn't heard from him so I messaged him just to confirm we were still on for our date . He said yes .I got home from work Friday to a message on MSN that he had to cancel for a family matter. I messaged him back .He was very apologetic and said that he really was sorry and wantes to see me the following week .I never heard from him.I made the mistake I believe of messaging him and asking if he still wanted to talk .He messaged me back and said yes ,always adding in a sweetie or princess I might add . He told me that we would make plans to see each other later in the week but he was really busy with work.I had met him on a dating sit and since we were not a couple I went on that same site five minutes later and there he was .I know it was wrong but I reacted .I told him that honesty would have been more appreciated than telling me he was too busy .Was he just no longer interested ,a jerk or was I too pushy? I was married for two years and with the same person for 7 .Am I just out of the loop when it comes to men.He took me off his MSN and I never heard from him again.

[agent1607307371]

He was a jerk and you were too pushy.

 

In a perfect world people would just say when they're not interested. In the imperfect one they try to save face/feelings by making up stuff to give themselves an easy out.

 

It's net dating. Keep yourself from getting too involved until you've had a couple of meets with someone.

[BriarRose]

A cancellation in the first few dates of dating is the kiss of death. Take that as an exit cue. You did nothing wrong, you liked the guy, you're feelings were hurt. He wasn't a jerk, either - just didn't know what to say.

 

Perils of on-line dating....people move so quickly - like kids in a candy store. It's very difficult, IMO. You have to have nerves of steel.

[Rosee]

People are always changing their minds. It doesn't mean there's anything wrong with you or that you did anything wrong, try not to take it personally. IMO he shouldn't have kept you on the hook, he should've just been straight up. Sucks, but you'll get over it.

[BriarRose]

People don't know what to say. They don't mean to hurt you, and I'm not saying it was right for him to cancel. Just that like Rosee said, people change their minds (or meet someone else) and they don't know what to say to the other person, especially if they know that person is kind-hearted.

[Ammy]

I have learnt that after one good date or even a few dates it's not reasonable to get upset when they are still on the dating site. I too, wish people would make up their minds quickly and not keep looking for options, but I have learnt this just isn't the way. I think that was the only thing I would say you did "a bit" wrong...

 

Ammy

[BriarRose]

He cancelled your date, said he was busy, then you find him on-line. Obviously not so busy that he can't find time to go on-line - so I understand your annoyance - and with that, the realization that he changed his mind for whatever reason. But he bailed on you before your little "chat", so it's nothing you did. Don't be too hard on yourself.

[Ammy]

He cancelled your date, said he was busy, then you find him on-line. Obviously not so busy that he can't find time to go on-line - so I understand your annoyance - and with that, the realization that he changed his mind for whatever reason. But he bailed on you before your little "chat", so it's nothing you did. Don't be too hard on yourself.

 

This is true also... I have found the ones who are online a second after the date finishes, or when they are too busy to meet up with you, are usually the duds.

 

Ammy