freinds with benifits.why?why me?

[cantbelievit]

I met this girl like 2 weeks ago at work, our relationship shows all the common signs(common for me anyway) that she "likes" me. So shes pretty cute and smart and I think I could make it work so I ask her out in a roundabout way.

 

She says no and then the rest of the night(at work) gets kinda weird but we are still talking right. She starts making all these sexual references, and in the middle of conversations, says things like "friends with benefits", and worse. Then she kinda starts subliminally injecting them into our conversations....like...out of nowhere. there has always been a lot of minor physical contact and lots of texting. but that was the first time anything like that. she makes a lot of references about both of us being single and how she doesn't need her old ex-boyfriend.

 

Basically im trying to figure out..why me? This is the third time in less than a year a girl has stated or hinted at the fact she wants sex, but no relationship. Im pretty young, but I don't believe in that kind of relationship, that's not the kinda thing I would do. I need help in 2 ways,

 

1. What do I do about her.....

2. What could I be doing that would make girls think I would be into that sort of thing? What can I do differently without making it sound like i want to get married or something...

[DrKitten]

You're probably devilishly good looking and make the ladies excited.

 

Kidding. It may not be you necessarily, but there are lots of younger girls out there who want to have sex without the commitment of a relationship. When she brings it up in conversation just let her know that you're not into casual sex and prefer to be in a relationship with someone.

[Capricorn3]

I ask her out in a roundabout way.

 

She says no ...

Give as good as you get. She turned you down. Now YOU turn HER down. Tell her you don't work that way.

[cantbelievit]

When she brings it up in conversation just let her know that you're not into casual sex and prefer to be in a relationship with someone.

 

The thing is, she does it all stealthy....like...i cant find a way to combat that way she inserts little innuendos into the conversation.

 

but...that's only a minor problem, im sure she will get the idea sooner or later

 

what really concerns me is that a lot my friends have decent relationships..i just don't understand what I could be doing to give girls this idea...I know a lot of people do that sort of thing, but they talk openly about it, i don't openly talk about sex or relationships at all, not even in jokes...

 

edit: im not trying to say girls throw themselves at me or im really attractive, its ust the ones that do wind up talking to me are like this^

[valenski]

Dude she's messing with you! Its flirting to the extreme and it sucks for you. She turned you down, now she's enjoying teasing you. Someone did it to me she would call me really late at nights but then dont talk to me at work the next morning, it confused the hell out of me too. What to do? You play her sick game and with enough smarts turn it so she no longer enjoys it or just give the silent treatment.

 

P.S. Dont go looking for love in every girl you meet, have some faith and it might just find you. Good luck.