Need advice. Please help. :/

[BoostedBaby]

I have been talking to this guy for 8 months, without ever talk about being together, or our true feelings about eachother. He's recently been telling me how he feels, and I've told him how much I like him. BUt he is asking me(but in other words) to tell him how I feel about him. I dont know how to put this into words. I've never been good at this. I need help!

 

I like him alot, almost love him. I know it sounds crazy, but I do. I want to be with him, but I don't want to mess up our awesome friendship. I'm not exactly sure he wants to be with me, but he says "If you would tell me how you really feel, I could tell you what I really want."

I know I should be come up with my own words, but some of us have a hard time showing how we feel, and telling others how we feel. Unfortuantly, I'm one of those people.

I just need some examples of what some of you would say in this kind of situation, or how you would tell someone how you feel about them.

 

Sorry if this post seems a little unorganized, and not put into words correctly.

Also, if this is in the wrong section, please move.

 

Thanks.

[JulianaF]

It occurs to me that I am not the right person to respond, because the first time I had to tell a guy I loved how I felt about him, I proposed.

 

Hmmm..

 

Whatever you do, just don't propose.

[Ebrithil]

Well only you know how you feel about him, although maybe you shouldnt tell him with words how you feel but express your affection for him in actions.

 

If you want to tell him somthing tell him you care about him, that when your with him its like nothing else matters. But I think the best way to let somone know how much you care about them is by just being there for them when they need you, showing that you want to spend time with them, the little things like the play fights and teasing to demonstraight you affection.

 

The reason he asks how you feel is beause he is uncertain, this physical interaction would let him see how you feel without ever having to say it.

[BoostedBaby]

I would like to tell him how I feel, before we see each other again, so I can change my ways a little bit. I know over text isn't a good way, but it is for us, because sometimes we are shy to say things to each other.

 

What is a way you would tell someone you like, how you feel about them? Just an example, I'm not going to use your words, but just to get an example.

 

Thx again,

[Cowboy Dan]

I care for you very deeply. You're unique, beautiful, special in every way and I can't imagine my life without you.

Got the gist of it?

[Ebrithil]

Well Im very close with a friend of mine and we share our affection with little jokes to each other and saying things like "I miss you" "Im really looking forward to seeing you" even just "Hey you". They are just little affectionate messeges.

 

If you want to tell him directly that you care for him just say that. "Hey I really care about you and I enjoy the time we spend together, sometime I wish their could be more to it"

[BoostedBaby]

So, I've came up with two things to say to him. Which sounds better..

 

I really like you. And I really care about you. When I'm with you it seems like nothing else matters.I dont care that it may not be like that. you;re my best friend, and i never meant to feel this way about you, but i can't control my feelings. "

 

Or

 

I really like you, and I really care about you, and when we;re together, its like nothing else matters. you're my best friend. and sometimes, I wish there was more to it, but I -know- things aren't like that, and I'm perfectly fine with that.

 

 

Please tell me how this sounds? Add something, remove something, just please help me

 

xoxo

[BoostedBaby]

Can anyone give me an opinion on one of the two above?

[Cowboy Dan]

I'd say go for the first one to put the ball in the other court.

[penelope13]

really like you, and I really care about you, and when we;re together, its like nothing else matters. you're my best friend.

 

This part is perfectly fine. But I would leave out the rest (the part that I didn't quote), because those don't sound like you want anything else.

 

I know it's scary to put yourself out there. But if someone says: "I don't mind being only your friend", I wouldn't interfere from that that you are actually interested in a relationship.

[Universe2]

Boosted Baby, just relax. I think you're overthinking it. Just be natural. In my experience rehearsing a phrase to say like that always ends up sounding - well, rehearsed. Plus I think it tends to make you anxious because you'll be trying to find the right moment to say it and all that.

 

Simple is better. Just tell him you like him, that you don't want to ruin your friendship with him, but you would like it to be more. That's all you need to say. If he hears that and he likes you, then that will be enough for him to share his feelings too. It's as simple as that. You don't need to make a flowery speech. You don't need to bare your soul. There will be plenty of time for that later. You don't want to scare him. But you want him to know that you like him.

 

If he knows that, then he'll know he can kiss you. Everything will fall into place from there.

 

If it turns out that he doesn't want to escalate your relationship, then it will still be ok. It will only be weird if you make it weird by gushing all over him straight out of the gate. This is not a super dramatic situation. So don't over-dramatize it. Be straight forward and concise and try try try to relax and be yourself.

 

Do this and you'll be fine.

[Jd1983]

Clearly, you have feelings for him.

 

Why not just write him a letter and let him know how you truly feel? This is much easier than doing so in person. If you feel a certain way, don't hold it back. You could truly be missing out on a great thing. Also, it seems to me as though he's definitely into you as well.

 

So what do you really have to lose? Just do it. Good luck!

[geekgirl4]

Keep it simple! And straightforward. No need for a long dramatic speech professing undying love. It can be as simple as, "I'm crazy about you and as much as I love our friendship, I want more."

 

It seems like he's definitely hinting at attraction to you. He probably already knows how he feels and wants you to be more firm with how you feel. Your 2 possible speeches both seem to say I like you a lot and I like our friendship. Be clear in what you want and be honest. It's scary as hell confessing your true feelings but its great to finally get it off your chest! Good luck! : )