im sandra dee Posted May 4, 2010 Share Posted May 4, 2010 I know how that sounds... like when I say "the diet starts tomorrow"... haha... But seriously, "No Contact" with the "loser" will start tomorrow and I will make a commitment or a promise to never call him or see him or speak with him ever again. This is a promise that may be a challenge to keep, but I have to prove to myself that I can keep this promise if I want to be a stronger and smarter woman. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Applewhite Posted May 4, 2010 Share Posted May 4, 2010 I know how that sounds... like when I say "the diet starts tomorrow"... haha... But seriously, "No Contact" with the "loser" will start tomorrow and I will make a commitment or a promise to never call him or see him or speak with him ever again. This is a promise that may be a challenge to keep, but I have to prove to myself that I keep this promise if I want to the be a stronger and smarter woman. Great! Did you read Super Dave's threads on this? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
incaangelique Posted May 4, 2010 Share Posted May 4, 2010 Cool. Cause I'm only day 3 now. Everyone else is so far ahead of me in healing now. I need someone to baby step with me. I did no contact for 2 months, then I broke it. Guess what I got fro breaking NC? No response from him at all, ignored completely, I also got a lot of anxiety and tears, and a smack down to my self esteem. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
im sandra dee Posted May 4, 2010 Author Share Posted May 4, 2010 Great! Did you read Super Dave's threads on this? not yet, but I'll look Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
im sandra dee Posted May 4, 2010 Author Share Posted May 4, 2010 Cool. Cause I'm only day 3 now. Everyone else is so far ahead of me in healing now. I need someone to baby step with me. I did no contact for 2 months, then I broke it. Guess what I got fro breaking NC? No response from him at all, ignored completely, I also got a lot of anxiety and tears, and a smack down to my self esteem. maybe we can help each other be strong? i know how you feel... i was ignored as well... we need to be strong... these men are not worth it... there are better men out there, I'm sure of it... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rtyre2 Posted May 4, 2010 Share Posted May 4, 2010 I know how that sounds... like when I say "the diet starts tomorrow"... haha... But seriously, "No Contact" with the "loser" will start tomorrow and I will make a commitment or a promise to never call him or see him or speak with him ever again. This is a promise that may be a challenge to keep, but I have to prove to myself that I can keep this promise if I want to be a stronger and smarter woman. I'm here for ya cause im only on Day #4 of NC right now Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Live-N-Learn Posted May 4, 2010 Share Posted May 4, 2010 I know how that sounds... like when I say "the diet starts tomorrow"... haha... But seriously, "No Contact" with the "loser" will start tomorrow and I will make a commitment or a promise to never call him or see him or speak with him ever again. This is a promise that may be a challenge to keep, but I have to prove to myself that I can keep this promise if I want to be a stronger and smarter woman. My ex broke NC with me yesterday with the type of email that truly deserved a short, polite and indifferent response. I waited a day and sent it. It was the right thing to do but there went my 18 days of NC! No regrets Day 1 tomorrow. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
im sandra dee Posted May 5, 2010 Author Share Posted May 5, 2010 Well it's past midnight so officially the day I'm to start my "No Contact" challenge. I can't even think of a single reason to contact him, you know, I think that I said everything I felt that I needed to say. I'm not crying, I don't have anything bottled up, I'm not missing him, I'm as cool as a cucumber. I can do this!! Absolutely!!! I can keep the promise that I made to myself to not contact him anymore. I will keep that promise. I am confident that I can do it. And should there be moments in the days to come when I feel otherwise, I will repeat these affirmations to myself even if I don't believe them in a moment of weakness: 1. I am strong on my own and don't need him in my life. 2. I am hopeful that I will meet a good man and when I do, I will be ready for something wonderful to happen. 3. I am comfortable with past choices and mistakes, they made me who I am today. To everyone out there trying this No Contact thing, we can do it together!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
im sandra dee Posted May 5, 2010 Author Share Posted May 5, 2010 I have no desire to contact him. Excellent! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OccultFigurine Posted May 5, 2010 Share Posted May 5, 2010 Good for you sandra-dee! I'm on hmmm day four I think (after breaking a 14 day NC) We're all here for you, keep at it! xxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OccultFigurine Posted May 5, 2010 Share Posted May 5, 2010 Cool. Cause I'm only day 3 now. Everyone else is so far ahead of me in healing now. I need someone to baby step with me. I did no contact for 2 months, then I broke it. Guess what I got fro breaking NC? No response from him at all, ignored completely, I also got a lot of anxiety and tears, and a smack down to my self esteem. Hi icangelique Although its painful to be ignored, you would be so many more steps behind if he had answered. Onwards and upwards! Day 4 for me Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Live-N-Learn Posted May 5, 2010 Share Posted May 5, 2010 Day 1 again. She broke NC on day 17, I waited a day and respond to her email. It was the right thing to do no regrets. Miss her a lot, think about her too much but can never take her back even if she asks. Sucks. She messed up any chance of me being open to reconciliation by lying and cheating on me. Wow I can't believe we went through as much post break up emotional ups and downs as we did. 3 months worth!!! Feels like we just broke up. I can't wait to get over her and not have this feeling in my stomach anymore. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Little lady Posted May 5, 2010 Share Posted May 5, 2010 I'm on 6 days NC. Sometimes I feel like sending her a message but there is nothing left to say, I feel. Last night in an old photo album I found these masks we had worn and had a lot of fun with. I still have to contact her to send her half of the deposit.. Was going to mail the masks! But then I thought, that was my memory of something good. But I shouldn't hold on to that and I want to let go! HELP! Also I kind of cheated and looked at her myspace (it's private), her status is 'hungry' I'm pretty sure she's 'hungry' for her boyfriend. So dumb, should've never looked at it! I hate how I knew someone for 6 years and then. BAM! KAPOW! Complete 180 degree turn days later. I feel pretty sick thinking about it, but in this I'll find the strength. This site helps a lot Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Little lady Posted May 5, 2010 Share Posted May 5, 2010 Day 1 again. She broke NC on day 17, I waited a day and respond to her email. It was the right thing to do no regrets. Miss her a lot, think about her too much but can never take her back even if she asks. Sucks. She messed up any chance of me being open to reconciliation by lying and cheating on me. Wow I can't believe we went through as much post break up emotional ups and downs as we did. 3 months worth!!! Feels like we just broke up. I can't wait to get over her and not have this feeling in my stomach anymore. I know what you mean, my ex and I were on and off again for a year and then we finally break up and to me it feels like we broke up for the first time because each of those were just peanuts compared to this elephant. Sucks that she's had to resort to a rebound relationship to get her * * * * together. I'm pretty heartbroken,, someone just smack some sense into me :splat: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
im sandra dee Posted May 5, 2010 Author Share Posted May 5, 2010 I feel strong today without him. I haven't spoken to him in nine days but today is only Day One of No Contact because I left him a message yesterday. Stupid me. I asked him mockingly how things are going with his new "girlfriend" (she's not his girlfriend... only in his head) and I wanted him to know that I know who she is (he tried to keep her identity from me). Maybe it's because we haven't spoken in so long that I'm feeling stronger today. Who knows. I can do this. It's extremely important to stick to the No Contact rule now more than ever. I can do this. And I have no desire to ever speak to him or see him again. I wish that I will feel this way always... I can only hope... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
im sandra dee Posted May 6, 2010 Author Share Posted May 6, 2010 I had mixed feelings today. Started off ok having no desire to contact him. Then throughout the day, there were moments when I almost called him. I didn't do it. The first day of No Contact was a challenge, for sure. I hope it will get easier. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Little lady Posted May 6, 2010 Share Posted May 6, 2010 I had mixed feelings today. Started off ok having no desire to contact him. Then throughout the day, there were moments when I almost called him. I didn't do it. The first day of No Contact was a challenge, for sure. I hope it will get easier. Just stay strong and believe in yourself. Believe me, everyday that passes it gets a little easier and goes by a little faster than the previous day. You will have your good days and your down times. But just remember you have the help of all these wonderful people on this website Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amandamarie Posted May 6, 2010 Share Posted May 6, 2010 Just wanted to say hang in there guys I do think it is worth it if you really want to move forward. My ex broke up with me 10 months ago, and I never really went NC for over a few weeks until about a month ago. Looking back it made it so much harder on me to be in touch, even though he was the one doing all the contact - but I didn't see it at the time, just holding onto hope I guess. Anyway, I am at day 31 today and I agree there will be up and down days but you all can do it if you have really decided that you are ready to! I feel like I am getting a lot stronger, even though I do have my bad days. My ex still contacts me all the time and I have to ignore him and just press on, so trust me if I can do it finally you can too Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
im sandra dee Posted May 6, 2010 Author Share Posted May 6, 2010 After I woke up this morning, I lay in bed and what thought popped into my head? The night he and I met. I remember what a great time we had that night. It is a good memory but we will never have the kind of relationship that I would have wanted with him. I must stay strong, it's Day Two. Someday I'll find a man who wants me as much as I want him. Better to forget this loser now! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
incaangelique Posted May 6, 2010 Share Posted May 6, 2010 Day 5. I feel fine. I haven't said that in a long long time. I actually feel fine today. Weird. I've actually been thinking that maybe this was all for the best. Maybe we were just so different, and the age gap was so big (23 years) that it was never going to work out. This is the first time in 2 months I have been able to admit any of this to myself. To my sisters here, stay strong. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
im sandra dee Posted May 6, 2010 Author Share Posted May 6, 2010 there is hope for me yet Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
im sandra dee Posted May 7, 2010 Author Share Posted May 7, 2010 it is the strangest feeling ever... he was so important to me... now I'm starting to forget him... and someday soon he will be forgotten completely... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
im sandra dee Posted May 7, 2010 Author Share Posted May 7, 2010 I almost broke down and called him tonight! But then I reminded myself that he was too busy to talk to me the last time that I called him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
im sandra dee Posted May 7, 2010 Author Share Posted May 7, 2010 hopefully day three will be easier Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
im sandra dee Posted May 7, 2010 Author Share Posted May 7, 2010 I almost called him... then I stopped myself by thinking what exactly will I say to him? Whenever I get the urge to call him, I should stop and ask myself, what will I say, that way I give myself a few minutes to get over it >> surprisingly it works. I suppose if I'm going to find some justification to call him and end No Contact then I have to at least be cool. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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