I dont get it. What am I doing wrong to deserve this.

[coolgirl]

I recently put a post on here regarding the guy I met up with on Saturday night. And how it went. But I keeping finding out things I dont want to find out. He tells me he was never married before and that he was just in a relationship with the women he has kids with. But end up finding out that he was married before and when I was looking at the divorce records here and found out he was married before and got divorced 4 years ago.

And he never told me any of this and just found this out a couple of minutes ago. He tells me he has 2 teenage children ends up he has another one too. I dont get it why does this keep happening to me? That's it I give up really do. I cant take this anymore. Really, really sick of putting up with crap like these really am. I rather not have anyone in my life anymore and not put up with any of this.

[HouseKitten]

It seems very odd that he'd lie about having another child.

 

Have you confronted him with any of this yet?

[oldenoughtoknow]

An extra kid, and being divorced as well? Like he thought these things would never come out?

 

You just met Saturday? So you've seen each other once (didn't read other post)? I think it would be reasonable to wait until the second or third date to disclose all of your pertinent dirty laundry. How did you find out about his divorce?

[coolgirl]

It seems very odd that he'd lie about having another child.

 

Have you confronted him with any of this yet?

 

He told me he has 2 teenage kids and also mentioned there names. But never mentioned the 3rd one. I kept going back and fourth with this a couple of times. I only saw this guy once. Were not in a relationship to start with and barley know him. I just instant messages him and asking him if there was a 3rd kid involved and haven't yet heard from him. I'm confused and dont understand any of this.

[coolgirl]

An extra kid, and being divorced as well? Like he thought these things would never come out?

 

You just met Saturday? So you've seen each other once (didn't read other post)? I think it would be reasonable to wait until the second or third date to disclose all of your pertinent dirty laundry. How did you find out about his divorce?

 

 

Yea, after talking about a day or 2 we met on Saturday. I dont think there would be a 2nd or 3rd date. If he's lying about everything. I googled his name and there is this website i clicked on and read his full profile with his exact number, and therer was a pic of him and his son came up and status reading MARRIED. So you can basically search the divorce records and found out his infomration on the site. He told me he was never married before. I know what I read & I know what I saw.

[oldenoughtoknow]

Yea, after talking about a day or 2 we met on Saturday. I dont think there would be a 2nd or 3rd date. If he's lying about everything. I googled his name and there is this website i clicked on and read his full profile with his exact number, and therer was a pic of him and his son came up and status reading MARRIED. So you can basically search the divorce records and found out his infomration on the site. He told me he was never married before. I know what I read & I know what I saw.

 

He's still married?!? Yeah, forget him and don't look back.

[faithful14]

If he's married, then let him go. There's no reason to be with someone who is going to be dishonest from the beginnning.

[coolgirl]

I found his divorce record online. I dont know what to believe anymore. The matter of the fact is that. I"m just so sick and tierd of putting up with sickos like this. I dont understand what I'm doing wrong to be deserving any of this. First my marriage falls apart ( i am divorced) then meeting people like him. I just dont understand how much more of this I can go through. Really dont. This is the 6th guy. Its like there a reason for me not to be happy anymore.

[coolgirl]

If he's married, then let him go. There's no reason to be with someone who is going to be dishonest from the beginnning.

 

 

I understand what your saying n all but you know why not be honest about it in the beginning and lying about it. Thats what ticks me off.

[faithful14]

I know, it's very frustrating to find out that someone you are interestred in is being deceitful. But at least iyou have figured out that he's a dishonest person now before you got deep into the relationship and started getting attached. There really are nice guys out there so don't give up.

[Mimori]

Sounds like you two just met. Not everyone is very direct on the first few dates, and they begin to ease their past later on. Sometimes, as well, people “hide” portions of their past and practically block them off as if they never happened, sometimes in attempt to not scare off a new relationship, and other times…there’s just something’s we’d rather forget than to remember.

 

But either way, obviously if he’s going to be keeping secrets of this gratitude, he’s not the man you should be dating. It’s really hard when you have a bunch of “bad apples,” but perhaps you need to work one yourself and stop looking for a relationship. Instead try and find friends instead of boyfriends and see where that takes you. From my experience, I met my fiancé by looking for friends…we just hit it off and since then we’ve been happy since. A few of my other friends have said the same, usually when you look you won’t find what you’re looking for…it’s when you stop (for some odd reason) it appears in your lap. Try and figure out what these “6” guys have in common and make it clear when you meet someone new that you desire a trustful partner that doesn’t keep their dirty laundry from you. Be cautious about who you trust, but you hardly new him, so it’s good that you didn’t start dating before these lies were revealed.

[coolgirl]

Here is an update:

 

I asked him last night. He said that was his sister's kid but I swear I heard something else. I told him he never mentioned his son's name and that he mentioned someone else. Then I confronted him about the information I found on him. I said Eric look I found this site that has your information on it you exact number your address and on status it say's Married. He goes off saying that its a lie. After I asked him he paused and 10 minutes later he replied back stating its a lie and he never wrote that. I just couldn't bring it up to tell him about the divorce record and asking what his ex's name was. Then 7 minutes later he asks me that do you see any testimonal that women that wrote for him. I'm like what the h... I said Eric that's your profile go check it out yourself. Then minutes later he tries to explain to me that what's going on I said say what ever you want to say and I left. He tells me if we didnt hit it off then we could always be friends I said thats fine. But why lie to the person your friends with. I dont get it anymore. Really dont.