is this normal?

[want to talk]

Hello, I am new to this forum and sought this out because of thoughts that have been creeping up. I was sexually abused by a babsysitter when I was a child, around 8 or 9. I am female and she was a woman herself.

 

I have never really dealt with these issues, however lately I have been very anxious and anytime I hear about something happening to a child I get those inappropriate visuals in my head about it, now I would NEVER hurt a child and the thought disgusts me. I believe I am trying to work out what happened to me as a child and wondered if anyone had any thoughts about this. I am a very nervous person anyway and this is making it even worse.

 

I have never spoken to someone professional and think that I may need too. Had anyone had these similar experience, or fears? I am really looking for some help here.

 

Thanks

[LightbulbSun]

I'm not a professional, but it sounds like you relive the experience just by hearing about it. It's a trigger for you. But that doesn't mean that you desire to do it yourself, you just have problems accepting it in your subconscious.

 

I would highly recommend that you try therapy. You need a way to get over this, and only a trained therapist will be able to provide you tools to do that.

[sidehop]

Welcome to the forum,

 

I'm very sorry to hear about your past. I would highly encourage you to seek professional counseling. The impact it has on anyone being sexually abused is far greater than what one can imagine in a long run. Stay strong. I'm sure others who may have gone through similar situations can give an input.