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Ok, I haven't been here for a while. I had been doing so much better. I was getting pretty well back on track and making it through my days. I've even been able to smile, laugh, and have a good time. I've been ok for a while. I even stopped seeing my therapist back in Dec because we agreed I had made significant progress and I was ready to hold the reins again. However, yesterday, I had the wind knocked out of me. For all background, just go read just about any post I have started and its generally about her and things about her.

 

I figured it was done back in June...see a previous thread. Its been almost a year and for some reason she decided to message me through facebook. I haven't logged into facebook since I cleared it out soon after our breakup, but I still get the alerts in my mail. But her e-mail states that she's hanging out with friends of mine and that we're bound to cross paths or be invited to the same events. There apparently was some event yesterday and there was talk of me coming. However, this is all BS. The people who she's referring to I stopped hanging out with after the breakup because they let me drown in my depression. Not even remotely caring enough to check on me. The event that was said I was possibly going to, I didn't even know about. Either they are lying to her, which I see no reason for, or she is lying to me.

 

She started the mail saying "I know I probably shouldn't contact you," they why did she? She ended it saying she would love to be my friend but would understand if I didn't. I almost feel like she's trying to make me the bad guy. I won't suck it up and be all cool while she cozies up to some other guy. Its been so long, there's generally no possibility we're going to around each other. What does she want? At our last meeting, I told her how it was going to be. I also have thoughts that maybe she's single again....she doesn't want to be with me, but she remembers how fun I am....so I can be the good time until she finds someone else. I was that guy before, I'll never do that again. I'm not a la carte, you can't take what you like of me and ignore the rest.

 

I just never thought something like this would knock me so far back. I haven't written back and I'm generally certain I'm not going to. The situation brought up in the e-mail is not likely, so there's no need to acknowledge it. I just would like thoughts and advice from everyone.

 

NoVa

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I think you've already healed enough... Though maybe the thought of seeing her again make you a sort of nervous (didn't know what will happen on that day)...

 

What I see with her is, I dont know if she's that cruel or leading you on but what the only thing I know is she's trying to lead you on or controlling you (She knows she shouldn't contact you but still she does and saying she loved to be your friend)... I know those words hurt but maybe she also thinks that you will come accross each other but she playing it safe so if it happens that both of you are in the same event, it will look like that it's ok for you if she'll flirt with other guys...

 

Like you've said, you're not hanging with your friends anymore and she will be there too... If you think you'll be hurt again, you may back out and not go to the event or you may go there and see if you've successfully heale (wont care whatever happens)...

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