How do I deal with this?

[MrAlarm]

I just found this site and after reading a few entries I am hoping that maybe someone can give me some advice... ok... so here's the scenario:

 

I dated this girl for 3 years.. she was the absolute love of my life.. i mean, we're talking I fell in love with her the moment I saw her, and vice versa. Our relationship wasn't without its problems, but they were never that bad or anything... nothing we couldn't work out.. anyways, during the last summer we were together, she started to hang out a lot with one of my "friends" who I incidentally had been roommates with the year before. Well, I guess one night she kissed him and realized she had "feelings" for him.... so she breaks up with me and starts to date him immediately.... this goes on for a few months... all this time we never really spoke.. but then a few months after the breakup we spoke to each other... one thing led to another and we ended up getting back together for a few weeks... but of course she decides things aren't working out because the whole time she is with me she is thinking of him, but she also says the whole time she is with him she is thinking of me... so she goes back to him... they are still dating now...

 

the one really big kicker in all of this is that the guy she is dating, my so-called friend (who i don't talk to anymore) lives 3 doors down from me in my apartment complex.. so I get to see her car in the parking lot and see her and him together EVERYDAY! I really don't know how to deal with this, since I still have feelings for her (though I have no intention of ever speaking to her again) and I want desperately to get over her... its just that she is around all of the time, and we have mutual friends that her and her boyfriend hang out with still... its really just one big mess and I have no clue how to deal with any of this.. I really feel like I'm drowning.. any advice that anyone could give me would be greatly appreciated... thanks, and sorry for making this such a long story....

[TearsofaDragon20]

hey mr.alarm welcome to Enotalone.com. well i was just in that situation just about a day ago. it seems she has this thing that she maybe doing and that is bouncing back and forth. never a good thing at all. because it seems she still cares for you and if she's doing things like that upset you greatly, then you might just want to break ties with her (read my post called "broken all ties.") that right there will basically tell you how i did it. but you may want to approtch that different way than mine lol. but back to the matter. she's putting you through alot and you sound that you really need a relese from her. if i were you i would just tell her that you dont want to talk to her anymore. because everytime it just hurts you more. tell her that she doesnt need to do that to you anymore. no one needs to deal with all that because it makes more stress which justs makes it hard to get over. i hope i helped some. take care. later

[girl_star]

hello:

you are trying to do what's right for you but due to the unfortunate circumstances, you are finding it difficualt to move on. not only did your ex leave you for your so-called friend, he just happens to live in your complex! that really sucks! it is so hard to try to get the ex out of your mind when even when you dont ever see them again but unfortunately that is not the case for you. you see her all the time and you know she is with the other guy which makes you think of her evern when you dont want to. the best thing for you to do is ignore her if you see her or them. if they say hi, say hi back. act like it doesnt bother you at all. even though the pain may be killing you inside, do not show it to her. at the moment she is feeding off of your misery. even though she may think you are hurt, you do not need to tell her or show it to her. there is nothing you can do about her always being at his place. you cant control that. you can control how you will act around her and around them. trust me, act like it doesnt bother you one bit and keep her guessing. dont call her or contact her in any way to let her know that you dont want to see her. do not reach out to her for any reason what so ever. its hard but it is the only way you can get through this. remember that as time goes by, it will sting less and less when you see her or them together. hang in there. this wont last forever, thank god!