I got the date... now what?

[Cetan]

Hi all once again!

 

I came on here a while ago looking for advice about how to ask someone out. It was pretty clear to me that she liked me, I'd just not done anything like that before and didn't know where to go with it. I thought I'd left it too long as well, as I simply couldn't do it- chalk it down to inexperience, nervousness, and so forth- and it seemed she was starting to get a bit chummy with someone else. She still is, but it's not like we're in a relationship, nor do we know where we're going with anything, if indeed there is anything, and it looks pretty innocent/not too serious to me. Sure, he's probably funnier and knows how to be more social in real life, where most of my quick wit and making her laugh comes from Internet conversations. Probably typical feelings I'm imagining. Anyway, jealousy's a killer, and I don't want to go down that road.

 

I was worried I was friendzoned, and I can't remember why, but I decided to go for it anyway. Anyway, one day I figured that I'm the guy, right? I've heard it time and time again that we're the ones that are supposed to be dominant in order to show attraction. So she was on Facebook one night, and I decided to start a conversation. She'd had a bad day and was tired, I told her I was too, and I still had more to go. I said I was going to the movies on Sunday just to relax. She said to come with us on Saturday to see a specific one, can't remember which. Sounds to me like it was a preplanned group thing. I said I couldn't, I had something on, and asked if she was free on Sunday. She was, so I asked her if she'd like to see one. She said yes, problem solved, I had my first promise!

 

Now, that night was club night. All our mutual friends (I met her through them) were there, and eventually I got around to asking for her number, so I could call her on the day and let her know what was happening, so we exchanged them.

 

OK, so story time's done, now you know what's up. I'm playing it cool for the time being, not getting my hopes up, for a number of reasons. Firstly, it's not Sunday yet, so I haven't called her. She might find herself unable to go, which would be a little bit of a downer, or maybe she'd be going with a firm picture in her mind of where we two stand, if you know what I mean.

 

The plan I'm thinking is movies at first (I know, not the best choice for a first date, but I was running on limited material then maybe grab a bite to eat somewhere to talk afterwards.

 

What I'm looking for here are answers for a few questions, and some advice.

* First, what do you consider suitable for a first date at the movies, and how would you go about it? I'm not going to force anything and I don't want to be weird about it, so there's no worries about that at least

* Second, the second date. If it all goes well, I'd like to take the energy from the first date and arrange a second. Trouble is, I've got no idea at all about what we could do, or even what's suitable. Is it even a good idea to arrange a second date then?

* Thirdly, any words of wisdom, advice, or so forth would be much appreciated.

 

I know this was an epically long post, so thanks for reading, and for any advice.

[FrankenBeans]

Don't do the movies on a first date because you can't really talk and get to know one another. There's a lot of awkward silence. Just go to dinner, have some drinks, and talk. Take it from there. Just be yourself and have fun. You can also do something fun, like mini golf on the first date too! Good luck!

[sns256]

I agree don't do a movie. You can't talk at all. After all you want to get to know each other better.

 

It can be really simple. I had a first date with a girl this week that was simply me driving around the city and her and I talked for a couple hours. (her idea) It was awesome!

 

Just take her to someplace that you two can talk to each other. Simple as that. NO movies.

 

I wouldn't try to over think for a second date. It may or may not happen, and you can get ideas for activities from talking to her on the first date! Good luck and have fun!