Complete Seperation or Grit My Teeth and See Her?

[mikeyc]

Ok. I've come to a major junction in my breakup. As my previous posts have mentioned my ex and I have the same friends. She is seeing someone else and until recently they have not been going out with our mutual friends very often but I have.

Now it seems that they are going out more often and our mutual friends have been trying to get me to come out as well. (Over the past 2 months, I've been phoning people to check if my ex will be out before going.) My friends (and my ex) say I have to face it sooner or later. My family have recommended complete seperation from her as I am still quite broken up about everything. I'm not sure which road to take.

I have no idea how I will react if I see her again and up until now the thought that I may never have to see her again has been comforting. I could carry on this way and avoid her by only going out when she is not or I could just see her with him and try and cope. (I think it would hurt me too much)

Please help me.

[SwingFox]

Hi Mikey,

 

The answer to your question is very simple. YOU have to be happy. Don't loose that out of sight. If YOU feel more comfortable NOT seeing your ex, then DON'T. Especially when you still feel hurt and still feel pain a confrontation might be adding negatively. I don't say that this necessarily will happen, but there are risks. In the end YOU have to decide if it's worth the risk.

 

To give you an opposite view: if you feel to date again, you will have to expose yourself again and get in public. Friends are a great way to go there, so that you don't feel totally alone.

 

I hope this helps you in whatever you decide. I wish you good luck

 

~ SwingFox ~

[cookies]

well breakups are really tougher on us if we still have feelings lingering in our heart for the other person, especially if we not only know they have a new significant other, but have to face them together in public. Thats really lame and disrespectful of her to bring him around you and both of ur mutual friends like that, without even having any consideration of ur feelings or the fact that you may still love her...

 

Yes it is true, you will have to face it eventually,..but its not necessary to have this kind of pain thrown in ur face. My God!...Thats painful 4 anybody to face. You shouldnt have to hide from seeing them, nor be sceptical about when you can or cant hang out with ur friends and feel comfortable knowing shes not gonna show up with him. Thats really unfair to urself. I would think that your mutual friends would have a bit on concern on how this has impacted on you, and how deeply its hurting you,...and speak with her about this a bit...

 

I know that you both are cool with ur mutual friends, and until you can cope with how she is bringing him around and with no concerns 4 ur feelings, id recommend that you try to find a way to cope with it as best you can, without lettin her know. Stay away for a little while, so not to face it,...so tht when ur stronger, it wont phase you in the least...one way to help u get over her is to remind urself of how she is acting. If she loved you, she would be just as sad and hurt...but she has moved along with her life,..and the sooner ur over her..the sooner ull find love and happiness once again as well...

 

good luck, because i know the pain u must feel...

 

cookies