Rebounds do they usually last!!!

[mlchildr]

We were together for two years have been broken up for 3 months. Broke up due to arguing. Three days after we broke up he started dating a girl that had been interested in him before we brok up. She worked at a bank that he has to go into everyday fro his work. He would always tell me these ladies flirted with him but he never date anyone that he worked with. They have been together 3 months and he has broken up with her twice and came back to me and then ended up going back to her. He told me he got in this relatinship to get over me. Do you think that this is a rebound and will it work.

[Mar]

Yes, I'd say it's a rebound. As far as it working, you can never tell. Most don't, but it depends on the circumstances of the breakup. Each one has different aspects and is unpleasant to various degrees. I think that rebounds generally seem to work if the person on the rebound was unhappy for a very long time in his/her prior relationship, because the feelings of love and security died slowly. Once the breakup finally occurred, there wasn't that huge overwhelming pain; more just sadness and loneliness that it was over finally.

 

But again, there's no way of really telling if they work or don't. Oftentimes they don't simply because the person on the rebound doesn't want to be alone, and so will take the first available person that comes along to avoid that loneliness and having to think. But for some it works out great......it's very difficult to say.

 

I would suggest you concentrate more on yourself right now, and healing yourself. Wondering what this guy is doing and whether he's happy or not isn't your concern this second-you are. If he's playing dodgeball with the two of you, then he's either not big on committing to either of you, or just wants the variety. Give him some space and let him figure it out for himself, and give yourself a chance to stand on your own without him popping back into your life for a couple of weeks until it doesn't work out again, and he bounces back out. Not healthy for him, and CERTAINLY not healthy for you.

 

Mar