fawndango Posted December 5, 2009 Share Posted December 5, 2009 How can we look for someone that is perfect, when by nature we are inperfect ourselves? Link to comment
Cognitive_Canine Posted December 5, 2009 Share Posted December 5, 2009 Perfect for "us". As in, their flaws compliment our flaws. No one is truly a perfect fit. But we can get mighty darn close. Link to comment
HouseKitten Posted December 5, 2009 Share Posted December 5, 2009 No one is perfect, and we all know that. But I think you can find some who is perfect for yourself no matter what their flaws are. For example, I think my boyfriend is my soulmate. We understand each other on a level we've never had with other people, after a far shorter amount of time than either of us expected. Neither of us is perfect - I have jealousy issues and I'm a bad driver, he has financial issues and is a smoker - but the nice thing about our relationship is that those things don't get in the way like they would if we were different people. 'Perfect" I think is someone you can love including their flaws, not in spite of. And since we all have flaws, all you can expect from a relationship is that eventually you will meet someone who loves you as much as you love them, no matter what your respective differences. Link to comment
fawndango Posted December 5, 2009 Author Share Posted December 5, 2009 Does that mean that we have the same flaws? Link to comment
Cognitive_Canine Posted December 5, 2009 Share Posted December 5, 2009 Does that mean that we have the same flaws? No, it means that the flaws balance each other out. While he is a pessimist, I am an optimist. He is more of a spender, and I am a saver. He isn't very health conscious, while I am. We keep each other in check and let one another have some fun from time to time by going against our flaws. I can't tell you how many times he's convinced me to buy something that I wanted, but didn't need, and how much happier I was that I allowed myself to follow his advice rather than habitually deny myself. Link to comment
Hopeless1234 Posted December 5, 2009 Share Posted December 5, 2009 my ex tells me she's perfect in every way. Link to comment
MD Geist Posted December 6, 2009 Share Posted December 6, 2009 Nope. We all have type of flaw. Its like trying to find the perfect car, house or job. It will have its pros and cons just as everything on this earth has. Unless your God you will not be perfect. Link to comment
tiff872 Posted January 10, 2010 Share Posted January 10, 2010 i don't think it's about looking for the perfect person, more so finding the perfect person for you. Someone that you can see their flaws and you know that they are not perfect and yet you realize that they are still very much perfect for you Link to comment
LAYAAN Posted January 10, 2010 Share Posted January 10, 2010 There is no such thing as a perfect person. The goal is to look for a person whose "perfectness/qualities" complete your "incompleteness/problem areas" and vice-versa. Also its very important to understand that you have to be "at peace" with his inadequacies. I wasn't in both my past relationships so I decided to leave instead of harboring negative feelings about them in my heart. Link to comment
Raize Posted January 10, 2010 Share Posted January 10, 2010 Well the girl I have fallen for over the past year, I have known Her for in all for about twelve years now so I think I know Her pretty well. Even the things that I like a little less about Her I still find those qualities in Her endearing and adorable. I would have to agree with the general school of thought - Nobody is perfect, but if you can love them for all their aspects good and not-so-good, then they are as damn near perfect as you could ever hope them to be. Link to comment
icarus27 Posted January 11, 2010 Share Posted January 11, 2010 Fawndango, I'm quite surprised that a person of your age and experience is even asking the question, Is there such a thing as the perfect person? The answer, I feel you already know yourself, is No. But then why are you asking it? In some kind of hope that you will find others who are unrealistically idealistic, and spend their lives dreaming about a knight in shining armour who never arrives? Forgive me for taking a liberty. I noticed from another thread about commitment that you wrote you recognise in yourself some of the traits of people who have relationships but never want to commit to anyone or anything. After my bitter experience with one commitment-phobe I learnt that commitment-phobes have a habit of convincing themselves that they are looking for someone even more perfect --- as an *excuse* to not deal with whoever is right in front of them. Not trying to play armchair psychologist, just asking if this is something that you recognise in yourself. Link to comment
Wilbur Posted January 13, 2010 Share Posted January 13, 2010 Perhaps being willing to acknowledge, accept, and reveal what you believe to be your flaws causes you to be the perfect partner for him because: 1. it shows that you are comfortable enough with him to be vulnerable; and 2. it gives him confidence that you are capable of accepting his flaws. They don’t need to be the same flaws; they just need to cause the same emotion. For example, you both have something from your past that you now regret. The same emotion is regret, the things you regret might be different. Link to comment
Jetta Posted January 13, 2010 Share Posted January 13, 2010 Find someone you love whose flaws you can accept. Love blinds us to the flaws initially. Link to comment
Jd1983 Posted January 13, 2010 Share Posted January 13, 2010 This quotes comes to mind - "You come to love not by finding the perfect person, but by seeing an imperfect person perfectly." Link to comment
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