You know it's over when.....

[aha]

Heard from the ex this week. We had a couple of friendly emails, nothing special just how are you stuff.

 

Anyway. she said she's seeing somebody else. I said, OK, thanks for telling me, take it easy. As soon as she told me, I thought, that end that chapter in my life. I was moving on with no contact and it wasn't easy. I think it will be easier knowing she's with somebody else. It hurts, but, I think it's best I know that. In a strange way.

 

I should've known she didn't really care. Now I know for sure. Everybody told me stuff like, it's painfully obvious, she did you wrong, move on. Thanks dE! You've been there for me and I appreciate that!

[Michael2]

She isnt out of your life yet. The ride has just begun.

[aha]

Based on history with this girl or lack of in terms of feelings, It's definitly done. The ride is over.

[Chandler]

It's good to hear you taking it so well. When I first broke up with my EX, I felt fine for almost a month. It was only when I found she was dating that I was messed up, not getting any sleep, calling her and wanting her back. But I realize too now that it's over for me and my EX as well, and am starting to move on.

[odysseus77]

i had a similar situation as you two...she broke up with me for someone else, and i was devastated...even though months earlier i had realized that she wasn't right for me...it reminds me of a remarkably true quote from The Portrait of Dorian Gray, "Its amazing what trash someone won't throw out, in fear of another man taking it." [/i][/u]

[aha]

Hey Chandler,

 

For some reason it's the opposite with me. I was devastated when she broke it off with me. It still hurts, and I've known for weeks it's been over, but for some reason I either didn't want to believe it or just couldn't accept it until now. I guess this was my final closure. The closure she failed to give me from the start of the end. If that makes sense.

 

She knows how I feel about her, but she chose to ignore those feelings.

 

 

-a

[litoosh743]

Hi aha,

I totally understand how you feel, but michael's reply made me wonder, he said the ride has just begun then i saw what you answered, what bugs me the most is why we always keep that hope and wait for that closure to realise that its really over, I'm not critisizing the situation I just wish we could all realise that as soon as someone walks away there is no turning back (of course not in all cases). Why do we leave it to their hands? they've already ended it, why even wait around and see if they miss us, they hurt us, they made a decision, why bother to even wonder if they will change their mind, they werent there when we needed them the most and basically they put us in that situation. Yes do the no contact thing but do it for yourselves, not in order for them to miss you because the decision has been made and its over as soon as they said it was, just wish we could realise that at the very second they do it. I suppose love makes us behave in ways we never would in any other situation. Be strong aha, its gonna be easy from now on and remember its all for the best and you deserve the best.

[fantasia2004]

 

 

 

 

 

I believe what you said and I agree with you . We give them way too much power and for me I lost that battle but I have not lost the war.

 

We should not hope just get on it will only trap us and kill us emotionally to ruin. I need my sanity and I refuse any man to take it away from me by having the upper hand.

 

Be strong Aha It is the only way otherwise you will be the worm on the end of the fishing pole that they use as bait to hurt you without you knowing it.

[aha]

Hey Fantasia,

 

I hear you. It wasn't as easy for me to just walk away from something I truly cared about. I thought she was worth fighting for. But I just made a fool out of myself. I realize now, she wasn't really worth it agt all. If she can move on so quickly, that just tells me she didn't care at all.

 

I felt like I was a worm on the end of a hook. I was holding on to hope some sort of hope since the end of March. I'm kind of relieved knowing there's nothing to hope for any longer. it was driving me crazy. I feel like I can move on finally.

 

 

Thanks

[elisaOU]

Aha, ok your situation is the EXACT same as mine except from the beginning he told me he was interested in this one girl. we had been together for over 2 years and he was the one that always talked about marriage and how i am the one girl for him blah blah blah. So i have asked his friends about him and this girl and they hang out, i don't know how serious it all is. When i started thinking about things at first i was like...this is my closure, he likes someone else...he obviously has gotten over me so i will get over him. i know how you are feeling completley. Then, he called me 2 weeks ago and just said some nice htings, said sorry. he didn't ask for me back and he still hangs out with this girl. i told him i ddin't know what to say and that he really hurt me. i changed the subject and that was the last time we talked. so of course after that i was like.....oh maybe things will work out with us. I am not back to thinking this is over for sure. Just be prepared b/c knowing she likes someone else won't give you all the closure you need, trust me. i think the problem is that i loved him so much and saw my life with him forever. so now not only have i lost my boyfriend, i lost my best friend, and all of my dreams for the future so i feel really lost. When you love someone they can push you and push you and you will never stop loving them. the thing is we both need to realize that even though we still love them, they aren't treating us the way we need to be treated. i just wanted to let you know that even though you feel ok now....you probably will have trouble dealing with in as the weeks go on b/c i have. it is so hard thinking about them together, and thinking about how exciting it must be to be with someone new. i hate thinking it.