Porn problem

[smarternow]

I think my boyfriend may have a problem. He watches porn everyday. I can't understand why. I have always been more than willing to have sex with him everyday. Hell, my sex drive is higher than his, yet he has to watch porn everyday. I have no problem with porn, even watch it once in a while myself, but I do have a problem with it being everyday. I would understand if we were not having sex, or if I was unwilling to try new things, but this is far from the case. He even go as far as researching the porn stars and finding out personal things about them. This really concerns me and I feel it is also disrespectful to me for him to basically stalk these porn stars. I have told him how I feel. He will quit for a while, but then in a few months, I find it on the computer again. Last night, I asked him to move out after finding it yet again after so many broken promises not to do this. I don't mind him watching porn once in a while, but the everyday is to much. My biggest problem is with him going crazy over the porn stars and researching them, even though he knows how I feel about it. It is highly disrespectful. I like Brad Pitt, but I don't look up everything he is in, nor do I pleasure myself to him, that would be disrespectful to my boyfriend. Porn stars are not fantasy women. They are REAL WALKING, BREATHING LIVING PEOPLE. I think he has a problem. After our fight, he cried and begged me for another chance, saying he will never do this again. I am at my wits end. If I find It again, I'm leaving him. I will not put up with the disrespect any longer. My question is, could he be addicted to porn. He went through a small period of depression when he was unemployed, and that is when all this started. He has a job now, but now the porn stuff is a habit. I don't understand why he would need to look at porn everyday, when he is not sexually deprived or frustrated, and what the heck is with the porn star fetish?

[Rain-man]

It's not really an addiction unless it really interferes with daily life. I think you may be being a little harsh on him. It's not like he's snorting cocaine with a homeless guy behind a grimy dumpster in an ally.

 

Edit:

 

I know you feel disrespected, and I understand 100%, but I think the best way to pull him away from it is by keeping him busy with you. He's probably spending too much time thinking about it and could use some time away from things that can temp him into it.

[Xplode]

ok ill weigh in on this topic.

 

i was satisfied with sex, with my previous partner. how ever, i still "looked after myself" frequently aswell. not that im overly horny or anything, i found that free time turned to boredom, turned to. oh look porn? haha, something to kill time thats all.

 

otherwise, its cool to watch different things that i wouldnt try with my partner...

not all people are adventurous and he may find that pretty hot. and scared to bring it up with ya.

 

its not always good pushing those boundaries, as they cant be undone.

[faithful14]

is he turning down having sex with you to watch porn all the time?

[Cognitive_Canine]

I think you did the right thing by kicking him out. I wouldn't put up with everyday usage. Just as I wouldn't be okay dating a guy who went to the bar everyday.

 

When you "have to", it's called an addiction.

[DropToZero]

It more than likely is an addiction.

 

It's not easy, men struggle with this much more than most women because men are so visually stimulated...and most women don't understand it.

 

If he wants to to change--he will, but he's going to need you to stand by him and help him in any way possible and be understanding.

 

I'm not saying you should put up with it for the rest of your life... but it's not going to happen overnight.

[Tetsuo_Shima]

Allow me to put in my two cents. I have been addicted to porn, having to view it at least twice a day. I went through therapy to handle a lot of things. For me it was a stress reliever, I didn't have to deal with rejection on trying something because I was the only one to ask. The addiction to it was basically an escape and sometimes to seek answers. Depends on what type I was looking at. As for the answers remark that is a personal issue I won't be talking about today. But I digress there may be another hidden issue he is trying to take his mind off of or some other underlying problem that causes this behaviour. Therapy helped me quite a bit. But I'm single now. I'd have a face to face with him and straight up get him to tell you the truth of what he feels when he watches it. You could also just cancel the internet subscription. And then drag his butt to the bed room and show him how sexy you can be. I know when I had a gf and she wanted to do just that i certainly wasn't going to deny her.