Perfection Posted September 1, 2009 Share Posted September 1, 2009 "i'll go my way now".... the last words i ever spoke to her about a month and a half ago. i was broken and down for two days but then i realized for who? the one who wanted to feel special but never made you feel special? the one who wanted respect from me but seemed like she had no respect for me? the one who strung me along for 6 months saying why didn't you fight for me and when i did for 6 months, said i never wanted you to fight for me? i have dived headfirst into work since the day i last talked to her. i travel internationally on a weekly basis for work and come back home for a day and a half. i spent endless hours working. i haven't slept well in the past 4 days not because of her thoughts, she does not matter anymore, but because i have been working till late night. i am exhausted at this point. really exhausted physically and mentally. why am i doing this? am i trying to hide my thoughts by distracting the hell out of my mind? i guess i am just feeling a bit down today and just need to get some rest. Link to comment
allgood Posted September 1, 2009 Share Posted September 1, 2009 sleep now man, get some rest. Replace some of that work with exercise and relaxation. Link to comment
Perfection Posted September 1, 2009 Author Share Posted September 1, 2009 i'm in the office right now...can't. Link to comment
paintedblue Posted September 1, 2009 Share Posted September 1, 2009 "i'll go my way now".... for who? the one who wanted to feel special but never made you feel special? the one who wanted respect from me but seemed like she had no respect for me? the one who strung me along for 6 months saying why didn't you fight for me and when i did for 6 months, said i never wanted you to fight for me? I like what you said there. I think many of us have traveled down a one way street and its like..why.. Link to comment
Crazyaboutdogs Posted September 1, 2009 Share Posted September 1, 2009 You are trying to smother your feelings but eventually they will come out. Sometimes you just have to feel the pain wash over you..the sooner you let it out the sooner you can start healing. It is good that you have your work..but you are suppressing your pain which is probably making you even more burnt out. Suppressing pain can take a bigger toll out of you than feeling the pain and then letting it go. Link to comment
Perfection Posted September 1, 2009 Author Share Posted September 1, 2009 You are trying to smother your feelings but eventually they will come out. Sometimes you just have to feel the pain wash over you..the sooner you let it out the sooner you can start healing. It is good that you have your work..but you are suppressing your pain which is probably making you even more burnt out. Suppressing pain can take a bigger toll out of you than feeling the pain and then letting it go. i believe i have. i was miserable for a couple of days but then i told myself i am not letting this happen to me. after being treated like how i was for 6 straight months, i think it would be weak of me to keep on giving her anything. my thoughts, my time, my dreams. so i have stopped thinking about her all the time all day. there are no doubt her thoughts in my mind, lingering around. but i choose not to acknowledge them anymore. but to counter all that i have developed this bad habit of spending exorbitant amount on time at work. and i have channeled all my energy into work, money and that's about it. work and money. and i guess i am just feeling a little tired at this point and i just need some sleep. Link to comment
KiNo Posted September 1, 2009 Share Posted September 1, 2009 Proud of you ^.^ You'll do fine jut like me. Focus n your work alright? You'll still think of her from time to time, its true, but will be less as time goes by. Let it go naturally, whenever you endured a sudden hard feel, be it sad or devastating, you're one step closer to be recovered. Link to comment
Perfection Posted September 1, 2009 Author Share Posted September 1, 2009 whenever you endured a sudden hard feel, be it sad or devastating, you're one step closer to be recovered. thanks dude... i like what you said here. Link to comment
needafriend Posted September 2, 2009 Share Posted September 2, 2009 . but i choose not to acknowledge them anymore. I totally agree with what you have said. She doesn't even deserve your thoughts. But how do you control your thoughts like you say?!!? I would pay a LOT of money for a "quick fix" to be able to rid him from my constant thoughts!! Link to comment
Perfection Posted September 2, 2009 Author Share Posted September 2, 2009 I totally agree with what you have said. She doesn't even deserve your thoughts. But how do you control your thoughts like you say?!!? I would pay a LOT of money for a "quick fix" to be able to rid him from my constant thoughts!! i don't think it's possible to control the thoughts. maybe someone else can give us an idea on how to do that. i can tell you what i do. her thoughts are in my mind a lot. most of the times it does not bother me, but when it starts getting stronger, i listen to music that i like, pick up a book and start reading, pick up my guitar and start practicing. this is on weekends. weekdays i just don't have time to think about her to that extent that it bothers me. if it does, i will start checking up on stocks and read up on articles and doing research on what moves i should do to make money. as i said, i have been killing myself just working. and chasing money. Link to comment
needafriend Posted September 3, 2009 Share Posted September 3, 2009 i don't think it's possible to control the thoughts. maybe someone else can give us an idea on how to do that. i can tell you what i do. her thoughts are in my mind a lot. most of the times it does not bother me, but when it starts getting stronger, i listen to music that i like, pick up a book and start reading, pick up my guitar and start practicing. this is on weekends. weekdays i just don't have time to think about her to that extent that it bothers me. if it does, i will start checking up on stocks and read up on articles and doing research on what moves i should do to make money. as i said, i have been killing myself just working. and chasing money. Thanks for the advice. And if you are concerned you are working too much perhaps you could take a small vacation? At least it would give you something to look forward to -- and planning for it will take your mind away from her even more! Link to comment
Perfection Posted September 3, 2009 Author Share Posted September 3, 2009 Thanks for the advice. And if you are concerned you are working too much perhaps you could take a small vacation? At least it would give you something to look forward to -- and planning for it will take your mind away from her even more! no vacations. i don't want any alone time right now. especially on a vacation. i just want to be constantly on the go doing something to keep myself occupied. reading, working out, working, practicing guitar, reading news/articles....anything... Link to comment
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