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NC Broken, lost so much progress... help.


nickfat

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My ex and I broke about about a month ago. I started NC and I have only spoken with her mother (we were very close). This didn't affect me... I was getting better and I think I was almost fully healed up until 5 days ago. My ex texted me and asked how I was and wanted to hear from me... I never texted back. Two nights ago, she called me at 11:55 at night. I answered. She told me she didn't expect me to answer and I told her to call later when she knew what she wanted to say.

 

She called back 5 minutes later and we talked for 3 hours... she cried the whole time and we talked about our memories and how we felt. She texted me the next day and asked what our "contact" rules are, since she wasn't ok and I am. I told her part of me was still in love with her, but I still wanted to be friends but at the same time, I didn't because I didn't want all of my feelings to resurface. She has been telling me she is still crazy about me. One of her texts said "lets just end up together and live happily ever after." She has been complimenting me and stroking my ego and all that flirty stuff... but here is the catch...

 

we are leaving for college in 2 weeks (different schools). I can't stop thinking about her now, I feel like i'm losing progress. help please

 

she also said something like "lets hang out" and then retracted her statement by saying "oh sorry i'm being too forward"

 

edit: i spoke with her last night and she confessed that for the past coupe nights, whenever i put the phone down to use the bathroom or something, she would whisper "i love you" repeatedly into the phone

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If your feeling is that all you ever want to be is friends, you may have to be the "bad guy" for a while and keep contact with her to a minimum so she doesn't get hurt. It sounds like she's not in a very good place emotionally...and if the contact is hurting you, too, it's not doing anyone any good.

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What is it you want, and what progress did you lose? Is your goal to rid yourself of her, or is it to reunite?

i lost my progress of slowly being able to get over her, little by little... i still was in love with her, but it was really supressed and i felt it going away. i don't know what i want... i want to reunite, but the time doesn't seem right

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I know how you feel, everything you went through already is coming back at you again and you hate it.

 

Same thing is happening to me, my ex forced me to break contact, even after I I realized what was going on and should feel better about it ( she sounded desperate) ... I hurting all over again.

 

Just take your time with NC and heal yourself. Give yourself the option at the end of the day you can either try or not try to get her back, and either option would not effect how you feel whatsoever.

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  • 9 months later...

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