I'm getting together with ex soon, need to know what to say

[Cen]

So the back story is we were very close friends for about 5 years before we actually started a relationship, but our friendship was very flirty and would've been a romantic thing right away if we hadn't met each other while we were each already in a relationship. Each of us through the years of our friendship were single at different times, and we were jealous of one anothers partners until finally the timing was right and we decided to be together.

 

We were together for just under two years, broke up in mid-March under odd circumstances ... it started when I brought up how I felt like I was working at things but she was backing away, she said needed time to think about things and ultimately 2 weeks later we broke up because she felt like she really needed personal time. I had wanted us to work things out, because honestly our relationship had much more great times than bad, and because of what we'd already meant to one another before we even began the relationship ... but she kept saying she "can't do it right now", and felt awful about it. I almost immediately went no contact and just focused on working on myself, I got a therapist (something i'd wanted to do but never took action with), I began to go out and socialize and meet new people, became very active, and eventually the most recent thing is I began going on dates with someone.

 

-- End of back story --

 

So last night I noticed she was online, she's basically disappeared since we broke up but I've heard updates from many of our close friends that she does miss me, she's not seeing anyone and isn't interested in trying to date, and she's basically been socializing the same as I have and focusing on bettering her career. I ended up saying 'hey' and we sort of caught up lightly on what we were up to, at one point I said 'well I just wanted to say hi since you kinda disappeared' and she said "I didn't mean to disappear I just didn't know what I was supposed to do"... this eventually lead to us agreeing to talk again sometime soon, probably in the next couple weeks. I got an e-mail from her roommate this morning, a close friend of ours, saying "good job!!" and that my ex was happy to hear from me, even though she knows we still have a lot of stuff to discuss.

 

I want us to have another chance again, and I honestly believe its possible at some point and that this IS the girl for me. I just don't know exactly what to cover, or how far I should go into that when we talk. I don't believe she is ready yet to immediately jump back into a relationship ... but should I compromise and try getting us to re-introduce ourselves to one-another and hang out and just keep my hopes on the back-burner that things will progress again naturally?

 

I really could spill my heart out to her, there are so many things I want to say ... but I want to do this right. Any pointers or opinions will help me Immensely!!

[Tigerfan]

I'd just catch up with one another, keep it light and fun, and let nature takes it's course if it's meant to be. Since she broke it off with you, I'd let her say what's on her mind first, and take it from there. I think if you get too "heavy" right away then that may scare her a bit and cause her to back off again. Just my $0.02

[catfeeder]

I'm with Tiger, no heavies. Your friendship is your foundation, so go back to that. It's where she's most receptive to you. Don't push for more, or you'll lose her trust--and if you go overboard, you'll lose her respect.

 

In your corner.