BrokenheartUK Posted May 7, 2009 Share Posted May 7, 2009 So I met a girl at a club on Saturday, we hit it off really well and had a lot in common. Talked, danced, held hands and left together where we sat outside and talked more until she left in a cab with her friends. As the taxi pulled up, she asked ME if I wanted her number so of course I said 'yes' and duly took it. She told me to text her to let her know I got home safe as I was walking home by myself, which I thought was really sweet. I got home, duly texted and had a little conversation with her, then she ended it saying she was going to bed and that 'we should hang out sometime.' I texted her a couple days later to invite her to a gig I was playing but she was busy and said I should tell her when my next one was and she'd come. I waited another day and sent her the next gig date but got no reply. I like this girl and would like to see her again even if we'll just end up friends, but I don't want to appear too pushy. I'm going out on Saturday again and am considering texting her when I'm out to see if she's around, good or bad idea? My senses tell me she isn't bothered and has blown me off but it would be nice to see what you guys think. Cheers. Link to comment
quirky Posted May 7, 2009 Share Posted May 7, 2009 I suppose up to this point, in her eyes, you haven't shown any interest to go on a date with her. Her coming along to your gig doesn't put you in the light of "the guy that makes an effort". If I had a good time with someone I would expect him to ring me, ask me out. Do you wanna go on a date with her? She can't really do much more, she gave you her number, she's been polite and I would assume it's up to you. Link to comment
kyriel Posted May 7, 2009 Share Posted May 7, 2009 For the record, texting is a very impersonal way of communicating. You may want to break down and actually call her. Listening her verbally respond to you may give you better clues as to her feelings for you. Its hard to discern little things like that from texts. She may just be cat and mousing you. IE playing hard to get. Its a bit juvenile, but its been done since time began. If she brushes you off again, or doesn't sound particularly interested when you call, leave it be for now. She has your number. If she is just playing hard to get, she will contact you, when you stop texting her. If she just plain isn't into you, you cut things off. Link to comment
cruzer Posted May 7, 2009 Share Posted May 7, 2009 If you text her, she is gonna blow u off again or show up. Why wouldn't you text? Your worried about being to pushy to someone who wont hang out with you? Why? so text her, and if she shows great, if she dont, the forget about her. simple. btw i dont buy the whole, im not gonna respond, im not gonna meet, im not gonna go on a date because u texted and did not call. if she is interested it dont matter. again, simple. Link to comment
BrokenheartUK Posted May 7, 2009 Author Share Posted May 7, 2009 Thanks for the advice everyone! I know texting is a very impersonal way of communicating and I should just man up and call. I suppose it's a sign of the times that my first natural instinct is to text rather than to simply CALL the girl. I guess I'm just scared she won't be interested or not pick up. I would like to set up a date with her so will get in touch and see what happens... Link to comment
lauramed Posted May 7, 2009 Share Posted May 7, 2009 First, I want to say that I'm so happy to hear that you have met someone that you may be interested in getting to know. I've read you're posts and know the heartbreak that you've gone through and the ups and downs of healing that you've been dealing with. This is a positive step in trying to move on with your life. Speaking from a woman's point of view and this is just how I feel...texting is a bit impersonal. I would be far more inclined to want to go out with someone if they called and asked me out on a date. Not a gig where you are playing but a legitimate date...whether it's to go out to eat or go to the movies....whatever. Save the gigs for when you have already gotten to know her a bit. Link to comment
Scorpion Fury Posted May 7, 2009 Share Posted May 7, 2009 Stop texting. Seriously, just don't. Call her up and ask her out on a date, not if she wants to come to your next gig. You'll be busy playing and won't even have much time to tlak to her. Save inviting her to the gigs until you've been dating a little while and she can bring a friend to keep her company. Link to comment
BrokenheartUK Posted May 7, 2009 Author Share Posted May 7, 2009 First, I want to say that I'm so happy to hear that you have met someone that you may be interested in getting to know. I've read you're posts and know the heartbreak that you've gone through and the ups and downs of healing that you've been dealing with. This is a positive step in trying to move on with your life. Thanks for this, it means a lot. I'm just trying to 'get back out there' and meet some new girls in order to help me move on - while I'm not ready for a relationship yet (and who's to say I'd get one anyway?), I am at least entertaining the idea of dating new people. which I am taking as a huge positive indicator. Scorpion Fury > Okay okay, I'll CALL!!! Link to comment
BrokenheartUK Posted May 7, 2009 Author Share Posted May 7, 2009 Okay so I called her tonight (no texting, hurrah!) but got her voicemail. Left her a message offering to take her for a drink next week. No reply as yet so the ball is in her court now, if she replies then great. If not, then it's her loss. Link to comment
BrokenheartUK Posted May 8, 2009 Author Share Posted May 8, 2009 No reply today, so I guess that's that. I'll never figure you women out... Link to comment
Scorpion Fury Posted May 8, 2009 Share Posted May 8, 2009 No reply today, so I guess that's that. I'll never figure you women out... She still may call. You said next week in your voicemail? So maybe she thinks there's no hurry to get back to you. But if she doesn't call, don't contact her again. Link to comment
BrokenheartUK Posted May 8, 2009 Author Share Posted May 8, 2009 I won't, don't worry. I admit I am a little bothered by it as I felt like we got on really well and she offered me her number, but I shan't lose any sleep over her not replying and just continue to go out and have fun. Thanks for the advice (I called her because of what you said and it felt good to do so). Link to comment
Scorpion Fury Posted May 8, 2009 Share Posted May 8, 2009 I won't, don't worry. I admit I am a little bothered by it as I felt like we got on really well and she offered me her number, but I shan't lose any sleep over her not replying and just continue to go out and have fun. Thanks for the advice (I called her because of what you said and it felt good to do so). I'm glad you called instead of texting. Text is just such a poor way to communicate and things can easily be misinterpreted, texts not received, etc. Since you got her voicemail, now you know she received your call. Link to comment
BrokenheartUK Posted May 10, 2009 Author Share Posted May 10, 2009 Well she did eventually reply and we've been in contact this week, but she isn't exactly being proactive in making any plans. She didn't say yes or no to the offer of drinks and hasn't even mentioned it. I'll take that as a big, fat "not interested anymore" so won't contact her again. I can take a hint! It's been an interesting week... Link to comment
cruzer Posted May 10, 2009 Share Posted May 10, 2009 Arent females crazy? She offered you her # and then isnt truly interested? Link to comment
BrokenheartUK Posted May 11, 2009 Author Share Posted May 11, 2009 I guess it's a lady's prerogative to change her mind Link to comment
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