feeling rejected or feeling like she never got to see me grow.

[Xplode]

Hey guys, just a quick post of some thoughts .

 

after driving past my ex yesterday morning in the car. dont even know if it was her for sure.. but same car. same colour.. and well basically the breathlessness tells me it was.

 

basically if anyone has read my massive post on how iv have grown from the breakup. you will know that i still miss my ex very very much.. its been 2 months of NC, i tryed calling 1ce. but she never called back.

 

been left with the feeling of rejection, but thats not whats bothering me.. ts the feeling that she doesnt know what shes missing out on... thats bothering me. any one have thoughts on how to convey that to her. without loookking desperate.. because i know if she went out for coffee once.. i would be back with her. all the things i took for granted i never realised and its taken me the breakup to realise it.

 

anyways.. thats enought of my rant.. i just want her to meet me. and how i feel i am now.

[AJEDrew7]

I don't know if you can do that without trying to "sell yourself" or look desperate. You'd have to just spend time together to make her realize it and that's not going to happen unless she's willing to get together (without you pleading to her you've changed). And if you can't get together with her, maybe you can focus your energy on trying to get someone else to notice the new you.

[nutbrownhare]

ts the feeling that she doesnt know what shes missing out on... thats bothering me. any one have thoughts on how to convey that to her. without loookking desperate.. because i know if she went out for coffee once.. i would be back with her.

 

You've tried contacting her once, she didn't respond. Sadly, and I feel for you in your pain, that's all you need to know. There's no way to convey 'the way you are now' to her without looking desperate - because it's actually borne of desperation and pain.

 

Ironically, when you have really moved on, really addressed your issues and become a better partner - all this will be part of your history and you won't be trying to claw back something in an effort to ease your pain. She won't matter that much to you. Simple, but certainly not easy to achieve.

 

In the meantime, keep up your NC, work on yourself and use the lessons of the last relationship to help you have a fantastic next one. But trying to go back, thinking you've changed, is not the way to go.

 

Good luck!