EX SITUATION-HELP NEEDED

[beco]

Ok here's my situation I was with my girlfriend for 5 years broke up had 6 months apart without contact then we started meeting up,we kissed once we've held each other at night but haven't had sex.

 

The thing is I found out she was seeing another guy for a couple of months maybe even seeing him while she was with me towards the end of our relationship then found out this guy treated her really badly and who's the first person she comes too-me!!

 

This is the bad part I did a bad thing and looked through her diary of the last couple of weeks and everything was about this other guy about how sad she was and how it had really mess her up. I was gutted truly heartbroken yet at the same time she wants me but not in the sexual way at least not yet and I know what everyone will say but she's also told me she was messed up so badly when we finished I don't know what to believe.

 

I am so confused more than ever I've gone back 6 months but feel worse because I know this is really it all or nothing I don't know how to bring up the situation. Really honest helpful answers are needed please

[stuckonlex]

the relationship she had with this other guy obviously sounds like a rebound realtionship that went really bad. You guys where together for 5 years and if she was seeing this guy at the end of the relationship she probably wanted to see what was out there and when she did find out she didn't like it. So rate now she's drawn back to you because your safe to be with and she feels at homes in your arms. The questions you should ask yourself is the following. Can you forgive her for being with this other guy??? and why is she coming back to you, is it for support and once shes stronger is she going to move on, or is she going to come back to you?? If this girl is worth the heart ache then i say bet it all on her coming back but if shes not worth it, be strong and move on. Defiantly ask her why she wanted to spend the night with you. Don't pressure her into anything or else she will run as fast as possible, but defiantly ask her what she expects from you.

I myself have spent a couple of nights with my ex and at the beginning it was just to cuddle and now we have been getting intimate together so that could change for you.

[wolfy1818]

It is DEFINANTLY an option to just move on, tell her she had her chance with you etc. But there is a real posibility that she feels as if she made a mistake moving on. I would definantly talk to her but don't make it sound like you want to jump head long into a full on committed relationship again (aka back to how it was), just ask her why she wants to spend time with you again and why she felt she wanted to come back and start seeing you again. Maybe you'll get some real insight to help you make your decision from that.

 

Personally (and this is only my way of looking at things) I am a big fan of second chances and a firm believer that people make mistakes.. big mistakes, we are only human after all. I personally give her the bennifet of the doubt, but that's just me in most situations. It depends on your specific situation, but honeslty talk to her and ask some of these insightful questions people here have suggested to give you a little more insight into her thinking and to help you make your decision. Take care, good luck, and keep us updated.

 

-Wolfy1818

[beco]

thank you guys for answering me it really means a lot that people take the time to help as this is a really big thing for me and I can't mess up