Moving soon, What should I tell her

[the47ronin]

Hi, Im 18 and I recently found out that my family will be moving in summer. Right now Im with this amazing girl who I love. She feels the same way (shes 17). We have only been together for about 2 months but we both have never felt this way about another person. She has said that she doesnt want to search for her soul mate anymore casuse she has found it.

 

If I move, I will be gone for about 2 years. After I finish my college course I will go anywhere she is. Do you think she will end it cause im moving?

 

Ive thought about basically puttting my life on hold for her. Meaning I stay here and postpone school for 2 years, get a full time job, appartment etc. This is risking a lot though cause if her feelings change, then I have basically wasted a year or two of my life. Any suggestions/comments? Thanks in advance

[White Rider]

hey

it depends in how much you love her and how much she loves you, try to come to her the other way, make her tell you to go, i mean, tell her that ur parents and moving but u want to stay only becouse of her and tell her what that will make you do and everything and if she loves you enough she will tell you to go with them and if she did then ull tell her that you will keepp in touch and that you will come to visit really alot and plaplapla

just be sure of how much you love each other, couse thats the main thing

best wishs and luck

[reborn]

There is a long way to the summer. If I were you I would concentrate on enjoying every day of this wonderful love relationship you seem to have. Why spoil it with talks about something that will happen in summer? Summer is a long way away.

I am not telling you to be deceitful, though that may very well be it. However, I am just telling you to protect the bond you have with this person. To secure it a little more before you let out such dramatic news. I think that your boyfriend moving away is a terrible preassure for any girl that really cares about him, no matter how understanding you both try to be. It will cause her stress and anxiety about your relationship and it will eventually very well afect it. Though it is hard to predict any particular person´s reaction to this type of news, this may have the effect on some people to pull away or to leave you before you leave them. This is a totally imature response but it is perfectly human. And as human that we are, we cannot predict what reaction we will have regarding a certain something that affects us deeply and stresses us.

You run a risk when you say this, don´t say it now.

As far as changing your life for this relationship, I think all that you are considering is normal. However, take it easy. Don´t see it so black and white. It seems like you are choosing between a future and possibly wasting 2 years of your life by not going away to college. this sounds like a very black and white decision. See what works out for you better. Also there are such things as long distance relationships. Also it depends how far away you will be also. It also depends on her. HOwever, I don´t think is fair either to her nor you that you sacrifice your college education and future chances over this or any relationship. If you marry her someday you will want to offer her and your children the best, and the best version of you will be going to college to prepare for a better future.

 

So if I were you I will chill, I will see how things go for 2 or 3 more months, wait for a perfect timing. Enjoy each day, one day at a time, stregnthen my relationship and then let her know but telling her about a long distance, making concrete plans to see each other. Making a commitment to the relationship, and reassuring her that you love her more than anything and feel she is your soul mate too.

 

Read all about long distance relationships and how you can make them work in the internet and on this site. See if what you learn about this is something you can handle. And if it is consider it an option. This is way more healthy and realistic than the black and white option you are considering: all or nothing.

Good luck my friend,

Let me know what happens.

-Reborn