Lost Dreams...

[Jetta]

What do you do when you lose you dreams? I mean all of them are gone. My dream of having a family and 3 healthy kids. My dream of being a singer (realized I just don't have what it takes a few years ago actually). My other dream is a college degree and that's fading away too. I know theoretically you create new dreams, but these are core dreams that just gone. I've become lifeless, lethargic, and suicidal (only I haven't done it and likely won't).

 

My best friends dream was to be a mom and she can't have children of her own. Isn't married, long time live in boyfriend, and well she isn't living her dream either. But she has outlets, I really don't have outlets my family was my outlet. I knew I needed to develop hobbies but that interferred with the care of my son and insodoing I lost him and the development of the hobbies didn't go so well. It was karaoke, which led to drinking, and ultimately the loss of my family and dream.

 

Now I'm alone, single, and destroyed. My ex husband can languish in my sorrows, which I know he did while lending a helping hand. I'm half scared to get back up because I'm worried they'll kick me again.

 

Just needed to talk.

[Lana0120]

It seems to me that life has been unkind to you, to put it mildly. Pursuing your dream as a singer might be something that you've put on the backburner, but at 34... I would have thought that a family and a college degree were still things you could achieve?

[Jetta]

Thanks Binoo, having lost a dream myself I know it's devastating.

 

Lana because of meds I have to take I can't have children anymore, unless I was to go off an be psychotic. Plus after losing kids I doubt I can adopt and I used to always want to adopt too, and then I'd laugh at myself because I couldn't handle the son I had. He has behavior problems, undetermined at that time, now it's some rare disorder is all I know.

[Lana0120]

I'm sorry to hear that Jetta. I can't imagine how devastating that must be. *hugs* At the same time though, there are things you could do aside from having children naturally or adopting which would enable you to have children in your life. Although I don't know if that would make things worse. I still think the college degree option is something you can pursue though.