Dani0613 Posted July 15, 2008 Share Posted July 15, 2008 Hey gang, I'm glad I stumbled upon this forum because I'm having a difficult time with my current situation and would appreciate any advice. I'm 31 and my gf is 24. I dont know that it would make a difference to tell you that we're both females, but, we are Anyway, we have been (or 'had been', at this point) in our relationship for a year and a half. The relationship that we shared was honestly one of the healthiest and happiest that either of us has ever had; it was filled with love, honesty, communication, respect, friendship, trust, etc. No relationship is perfect and we definitely had our share of rough spots, but overall, there really wasn't anything lacking or negative about our situation. My gf recently broke up with me and really has no definitive reason for having done so other than she needs to focus on herself. When we broke up, she looked at me and told me I was her best friend, that she loved me, and that we could try again when she's ready, but to not wait for her. Honestly, I know she's confused and all over the place right now. While I can appreciate that she has recognized she needs to devote some time and energy to her personal growth, I'm having a difficult time accepting how she could throw away our relationship so easily. When I questioned her as to how she could, she had no answer for me. I know she loves me because our mutual friend(s) have made that very clear. Our friends are hopeful that we'll get back together because they truly feel and believe that she is just extremely confused and has no clue what she wants. Or, that she's not ready for it. Or, that she needs a wake up call! I'm in the NC phase right now because it's the best thing for ME at the moment. At the advice of others, I've been told to not be so readily available to her because it's what she's accustomed to. I just feel like I'm too old to be playing these games. I know she has agreed to go to therapy to help her with herself (she has a few issues from her past that she hasn't dealt with) and I'm optimistic that counseling will open her eyes to some things. I can tell you that she has no desire to pursue another relationship and that she hasn't even entertained the idea. I know this to be a fact because of our friends and because she's told me. She's made it clear that she needs to focus on herself and what she wants...and the only way to do that is alone.... I guess my question would be, have there been instances where one of the partners has ended the relationship out of fear or confusion, but realizes he/she is a * * * * * * * and comes back? This is just a * * * * ty situation because nothing in the relationship has warranted this.. Any suggestions? Link to comment
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