i need to call her. help!

[dessmos]

Okay heres the deal. I've known this girl for a few months now although we never have really been conversational with each other. Or rather had a real conversation together until just recently. Alright so i can't stop thinking about her. I used to be interested in her friend but that died down and know all i need is her. all i can think about is her and i can think of something and somehow link it back to her. So i know telling her all this might be scary for her although i'm not sure as we do know each other. I'm not sure if i have been receving signs from her or if she acts this way. Recently she came into my work with some friends and she told me that she specifically came in to see me. I have managed to get her number out of the phone book. and i want to call her. but i'm not sure how she would react to me calling her without her directly giving me her number. help me please. should i call her?

[ameliamolly]

Dessmos,

I don't think it would hurt for you to give her a call, but keep the conversation light. It sounds like she has been giving you some signals: "Recently she came into my work with some friends and she told me that she specifically came in to see me."

 

I wouldn't bombard her with your feelings immediately. During the conversation say something like "why don't we go out and (see a movie, grab some dinner, get a drink or whatever you two might enjoy) sometime" if she seems receptive and says "yes, that's sounds good", then ask when she has free time. Make it for a few days later and set up the date.

 

Be careful that you don't come onto strong right away. This could send her running for the hills. You could let her know you are interested in getting to know her better and see how she responds from there.

 

Let us know how it works out for you, good luck!

[Ash]

At this point, I'd agree and say to give her an easy going call. She's made it known somewhat that there is a possible interest in you. You don't have a lot to loose at this point if you do call and it doesn't work out. There is a risk in calling if it is too soon, and that sort of thing offends her, but I doubt it. If she came to your workplace and let you know that she was there essentially to see you, than I don't think she'd see a call as too pushy.

 

I also agree you should keep it light. Don't get into your feelings. Let those sit for a while. Expressing strong feelings for her at this point could have an adverse affect.

 

Try to convince yourself you're not obsessing over her. If you think you are, you may want to give it some serious thought before calling. Ask yourself how you'll feel if she rejects you. Don't put yourself in a situation that will cause either of you any hurt.

 

If the feelings are just strong, and she's not in your every waking moment, then hopefully you're not obsessed. Just a caution.

 

Definitely go at things from the viewpoint of building a friendship first. If you approach from this angle, see her as a person first, a friend, before you get to the girlfriend issues.

[dessmos]

Thank you both of you, i think that i'm gonna give her a call soon. thanks i have some things to thing about now, i'm not obsessed with her but i do have stong feelings for her. I won't express these right away and i will definitely start at the bottom with a friendship and work my way up. thanks so much both of you. I have a lot more advice and guidance now that you both took some time to answer my post. THANKS!