NoLies_JustLove Posted June 14, 2008 Share Posted June 14, 2008 So I've known him for about 3 years, and we were talking for about a year and a half but never made anything official because he was so worried of what other people would say about the age difference (im 16, hes 19) but he still admitted to having strong feelings for me. From then on we basically had a love hate friendship because he would be mad at me every other week for something that had little to no importance. Things were a bit awkward for me because i was so scared of being "annoying" so i spaced out some, and set some boundaries so that i wouldn't become overwhelming but i was still being a friend. He finally made it official on 4/11/08 but made me swear that we would keep it between us two only. after we had been dating for about 2 weeks we started telling some people & he started to become more comfortable knowing that people really didn't care. he told me he was happy and could see us together for a long time, and when he started to fall in love with me he told me. Then one day he flipped out on me because a friend of mine had a picture on her myspace of me that had the caption "jailbait because the best things in life are illegal" on it. it was a three year old picture of me on my moms truck at the beach. i think he took it a little over board saying that he lost all trust for me. the following day we broke up because of his lack of trust for me. needless to say, a week or so later he sent me text messages that said 'i miss you' & 'i cant stand being alone' and he said he still loved me and wanted to be with me two days later i asked him i he would like to hang out for awhile after work and his response was 'no.' so i said "whats up with you, two days ago everything seemed to be fine, and now it feels like your pushing me away?" and to that he had no answer. From that day on we haven't talked and a week later he deleted me off myspace completely and privated his profile. it was kinda just dead-ended and he left me hanging with no explanation. i still dont know exactly why he let things just drop like he did, i dont understand how a persons opinion could change so drastically in two days after saying their feelings for you have not changed. any opinions? i really need some Link to comment
GoldenHillGuy Posted June 14, 2008 Share Posted June 14, 2008 Honest opinion....you're too young. Link to comment
littlestar Posted June 14, 2008 Share Posted June 14, 2008 He sounds confused and while he may have over reacted to the "jailbait" comment, legally dating you is illegal and can see him land in hot water over this. Maybe he has decided it is better to leave you be than risk going to jail. Link to comment
NoLies_JustLove Posted June 14, 2008 Author Share Posted June 14, 2008 thanks for giving me your opinions but i dont think the age difference should matter when he just turned 19 and we have known each other for so long. the feelings were there im sure of that and we both knew that my parents had no problems with us dating infact they loved him. i just dont know why he would just leave me hanging like that... Link to comment
NoLies_JustLove Posted June 14, 2008 Author Share Posted June 14, 2008 is there something you think i could say that might bring him to talk ? it really does mean alot to me. Link to comment
littlestar Posted June 14, 2008 Share Posted June 14, 2008 I dont think that the age difference is the issue here, it's that you're illegal for him to go out with. Link to comment
NoLies_JustLove Posted June 14, 2008 Author Share Posted June 14, 2008 i dont believe that dating is illegal, its sexual relations that are illegal... i just want some ideas of what i should try and say to him to maybe atleast keep our friendship for now. Link to comment
littlestar Posted June 14, 2008 Share Posted June 14, 2008 i dont believe that dating is illegal, its sexual relations that are illegal... i just want some ideas of what i should try and say to him to maybe atleast keep our friendship for now. A lot of the times dating leads to something sexual. But not always. I guess its hard for you to say anything to him to keep him around when he is completely ignoring you and deleted you. Might be best to try to heal your heart and move on without him. Link to comment
deang Posted June 14, 2008 Share Posted June 14, 2008 you are young and I know this hurts but trust everyone here and the world...this will seem silly to you in later years as you mature and learn who you are. Just relax and give him space and I'm sure after feelings have died down that you will be friends again. Link to comment
NoLies_JustLove Posted June 14, 2008 Author Share Posted June 14, 2008 you are young and I know this hurts but trust everyone here and the world...this will seem silly to you in later years as you mature and learn who you are. Just relax and give him space and I'm sure after feelings have died down that you will be friends again. thanks, thats what im trying to do, i just dont want to completely let go. he was a huge part of my life and the memories just seem to keep flooding back. i recently lost alot of my close friends too so im just trying to get out and keep my mind busy. do you think it would be a bad idea to try and re-add him on myspace? Link to comment
NoLies_JustLove Posted June 14, 2008 Author Share Posted June 14, 2008 A lot of the times dating leads to something sexual. But not always. I guess its hard for you to say anything to him to keep him around when he is completely ignoring you and deleted you. Might be best to try to heal your heart and move on without him. i understand that completely and have given it much thought, but thats honestly not what worries me, my problem is with the fact that he just kind of put a brick wall in front of me with no reason why... i cant seem to find any other reason then; maybe he got scared because his feelings were getting stronger as well and he doesn't want to end up disappointed or hurt because thats all he thinks will happen due to his past relationships. what would you suggest i do, i want to try and start a friendly conversation but i just dont know how much time to allow... Link to comment
deang Posted June 14, 2008 Share Posted June 14, 2008 I think you should give it some time then re-add him...can you go a few weeks without being on his myspace? Let things cool down a bit ...what have you got to lose? You know how to contact him and he knows how to contact you. You can always add him later. I think you need to take a breather and relax. Don't worry that he won't be part of your life. If you were that good of friends you won't have difficulty reconnecting. I've had girlfriends find me years later...I don't think you can ever really say someone will leave your life permanently until they pass away. I've had an ex gf track me down after 8yrs. Link to comment
NoLies_JustLove Posted June 14, 2008 Author Share Posted June 14, 2008 I think you should give it some time then re-add him...can you go a few weeks without being on his myspace? Let things cool down a bit ...what have you got to lose? You know how to contact him and he knows how to contact you. You can always add him later. I think you need to take a breather and relax. Don't worry that he won't be part of your life. If you were that good of friends you won't have difficulty reconnecting. I've had girlfriends find me years later...I don't think you can ever really say someone will leave your life permanently until they pass away. I've had an ex gf track me down after 8yrs. well he has his myspace set to private & where no one outside his friends list can message him, so really i have no way to contact him through myspace without adding him and receiving his approval. i do have ways of viewing his profile if i log onto a different persons account who already has him added as a friend, but im not sure he knows that. 2 weeks after everything i did try to text him and see how he was doing but didnt receive a reply for what ever reason. its been about 2 weeks since then... its hard to try and solve a problem when you dont really know exactly what caused it to begin with, thats why im having so much trouble with this. but i do agree with what you said about reconnecting, thats amazing how things can happen like that, im just trying not to let him drift to far away from my reach, and i dont want him to get the feeling that ive moved on, because i have not... Link to comment
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