i crush too fast

[Pengui6668]

Baically it right there... if i see a pretty face, nice smile, if she's sweet, funny, nice body, i'm done.. Instantly think she's the greatest thing to happen since sliced bread... i dunno why it's just how i work i guess... it gets annoying though cause regardless of whether or not they have a man i still like them and that effects my relationship with them (friendship).. i get jealous and stupid basically... Just wondering if anyone else is like me and just crushes on a girl right away....

[kdreger]

Your problem is that you want to be in love. You're in love with the idea of her and you, not the reality. Nothing is wrong with that unless it effects your relationship with her. Which it is.

 

There's a saying that if you want something too badly you give off a "vibe". Women can feel that vibe based on your body language and actions. At that point, you're your own worst enemy. You keep this up and you will destroy any chance you have.

 

You have to appreciate that what you feel isn't real love. Real love is something far greater and far less selfish. Better to go in expecting NOTHING and then your behaviour will be more fair to both of you.

[Pengui6668]

I'm certainly in love with the idea of being in love.. But i know i don't love this girl.. i'm grounded in reality... it hasn't affected anything yet cause we were only together for a little more than a day (visited her with my friend who knows her from school)... She just seemed so easily dateable... beautiful, sweet, smart, hot body, HUMBLE, good sense of humor.... i dunno... I visit my friend at college like once a month so, i'll see her more often, but, i dunno how to go about letting her know i'm interested without looking like that's all i want out of her... If she doesn't wanna date completely cool, not a huge deal, but i think most girls think guys that ask them out just wanna date them and that's it...

[parasiticliquid]

That's me. I fall in love to easy

[kdreger]

It sounds more like a fear of being hurt or her not being interested.

 

Since you're in reality and know that you don't truly love her then that's a good start.

 

As I mentioned, the best way to approach it is without the expectation that you're going to get anywhere. It's important that you have that sort of attitude as it will show in your body language and you won't scare her off. The worst thing you can do is get too intense too quickly - it's just too much pressure.

 

If you fear asking her straight out or expect you won't be successful, try to approach her from a friendship angle. If it's meant to be (as in if she finds you attractive too) then it's meant to be.

 

Final note: Don't let it get out of hand by fantasizing or punishing her if she's not interested. Remember, she has friends and those friends are potential dates. Worst case, you increase your circle of dateable friends.

[Colls]

Hey im a girl....i just have to say that i do the exact same thing. Like if a guy pays even the smallest bit of attention to me, i instantly fall for him. If he talks to me or makes eye contact, hes my new crush. That's how i fell for tony. It was completely dark at work last year, and he made eye contact and followed it through until i completely walked past him. I still like him to this day. That was probly the most intense one lol.

 

But yeah i need help on this too. I wish i could be able to have normal friendships with guys, without thinkin im in love with them. So good luck with that 2 u 2 lol.

[Jeffrey19]

Yep I know where you're coming from penguin. I'm still stuck on one of my co-workers. A fair few girls start to talk with me but only rarely do very pretty girls just come out of the blue and make small talk with me, and when hot chicks do initially start off with me I'm instantly smitten and think to myself "hey, maybe she's interested..."

 

But I never think like that about the other girls, strange. I've only had 4 crushes(not love) in my 19 years on earth, but boy were they painful knowing I can't have them....

 

Oh, what was your question again? Oh yeah, you're not alone I have the same problem