Should I keep them or let them go

[musicguy]

I've known my drummer and his girlfriend for 7 years. I've been watching their kids grow up (they have 4 kids) Their 2nd oldest is my little shadow. They are both on disability, she's 28 and she's never worked in her life and he's gonna be 35 June 20th and has had 2 jobs (that I know of since I've known him) Also, when I talk to her on the phone, she just rambles on and on (motormouth) about pointless things or what her kids did at home or how much their kids pooped. and he emotionally abuses her a lot and the kids see this happening. They basically live off of the state and have all of these nice things. A 50 inch tv and recording equipment (his for the band) Two years ago they got their kids taken away because of something that their son said to his teacher and this is their kids schedule. The three older ones go home around 3:50, they eat dinner an hour later and right after dinner they go to bed around 5-5:30pm. (yes, even in the spring and summer) My friends don't even let their kids play outside, I'm the one who takes them to the park or plays with them when it's nice out. Their disciplinary skills are worthless because their kids don't listen to them anyway, yet they listen to me. My friends kids' swear, burp and fart constantly (even at the dinner table) and they imitate everything that people do (of course, because they are kids) So I try not to swear a lot and be a good example for them). Yet my other friend Dan (singer of my band) who goes to the house swears and burps up a storm anytime he wants. Their kids are rude and selfish, are rude at the dinner table, are super hyper and they punch and kick, not only me, but each other.

 

Both my drummer and his girlfriend are bad parents (I often see him push them away when all they want is a hug) and I try to tell them ways to help them out with disciplining their kids or being more attentive to their kids or be better parents, but it's like talking to a brick wall. I know that this is my decision to make whether to keep on being friends with them, but since I've known them for a long time, they are nice people and I love their kids as if they were my own, it just kills me to see the environment their kids are growing up in. (luckily there hasn't been any physical abuse toward each other or the children)

[jayn-16]

I have no experience as a parent, but still heres what I think.

 

There is little you can do about these kids. To improve them you'll have to do more than what the parents are doing, that will mean committing yourself to them. Devoting lots of time. So it will be better to engage yourself 100% or not be engaged at all, emotionally and physically. Personally I would start staying away from them.

 

Is there any organization which can help parents with their kids ? Maybe you could refer them to one.

 

There are thousands of kids growing up in the same way as these four are. If they grow up as mature adults then they will be better parents, or the cycle will continue.