Is she trying to hook up with me??

[SadMan]

I have a friend that is a girl thats been asking me to take her out to watch a movie with her. I am not sure if I should go because shes been very flaky in the past.

 

I say that beacause shes asked me out before and I would block off a day for her but when I call her to confirm like a day or two before, I would always get a voice mail but she would never call me back..... like shes disappear or something. But when she finally answers her phone we would talk for a little bit then she said she sould call me back and never calls me back. Then I would have no choice but to cancel on her because I cant confirm anything and move on with my orginal plans.

 

I've known this girl for a year or two now. We had dinner and lunches before and I kinda did make a move on her before but she was in a LD relationship and didnt seem too interested so I backed off.

 

I guess her relationship didnt work out and after a year, shes called me a few time about going out for a dinner and a movie and to catch up I guess..... She also sounds very strange on the phone lately how she tells me shes not going out with her friends, always staying home, she wants someone to take care of her.......But i know for a fact that she has a large population of friends and she is a very out going person.

 

I assume shes saying that because her father recently pasted away.

 

So she called me again last night for a dinner and a movie this weekend and I want to keep it down to the friends level but not close any doors.

 

Should I pay for everything??

Will this give her any wrong ideas? or we should just pay for ourselves?

 

I am 27 and she is 25~26 I think. We both have good jobs.

 

Thanks for the help.

[arcadefire]

I don't see why not pay for the both of you unless she objects. It shows some manners and that you don't want to close any doors.

 

If she continues to flake, though, you're better off moving on. Let's hope she shows some interest towards you as well. Good luck!

[DN]

Sounds to me that she is using you as a back-up and if she gets a better offer she will do that.

 

I think you should move on to someone less flaky.

[drewciouS281]

I have a friend like this too. I just dont offer to do anything. i just let her babble about how we should hang out. I tell her "im going to be at this bar tonight, if you wanna meet me that would be great, if not no biggie". I cant stand flakes. I usually just write em off.

 

If you actually do get her out the paying things can vary. If its someone i may wanna get to know and do have some interest ill wait a bit after the check arrives to see if she pulls out her wallet (this shows me she is not a cheep skate) Then i will offer. If the girl insists, ill let her pay or split it and offer to get drinks somewhere else. or if she backs off, ill pay and say in a flirtatious way "you can buy me a drink later ;-)"

[CaptainNapalm]

If she can't even follow up on simple plan arrangements then she is probably not relationship material or at least not for you. You should either put her in the friend category immediately or alternatively tell her exactly what you told us and how you feel and what her thoughts are with regard to the two of you. Talking to her about this is definitely not out of place as you've known her for quite some time now. If she doesn't give you a straight answer or avoids the convo than treat her as a friend.

[enkymion]

If she can't even follow up on simple plan arrangements then she is probably not relationship material or at least not for you. You should either put her in the friend category immediately or alternatively tell her exactly what you told us and how you feel and what her thoughts are with regard to the two of you. Talking to her about this is definitely not out of place as you've known her for quite some time now. If she doesn't give you a straight answer or avoids the convo than treat her as a friend.

 

Yeah... Never go to their friends dude. Bad, bad look.