I don't think I can leave right now

[headunderwater]

 

The anxiety over it all is physically making me sick and unable to function.

 

Me crying out of nowhere is making him worry and hang on tighter.

 

I don't know that I can do this on June 16th.

 

June 7th is our 10 yr wedding anniversary.

 

*cry*

 

I'm drinking. I don't do that often, it leads to more drinking and crying.

[Angel_baby]

I know how hard and scary the feeling of leaving is. It hurts to even think about it. But in the long run you will be happier then you are feeling right now.

 

You CAN do it. Do it for you and do it for your kids.

 

It has been 10 long years of unhappiness and fear. Getting out now means you can start healing and get back to being YOU again. Not the zombie of a person your husband has made you feel like.

 

As a fellow stay at home mom who is abused... I know how hard it feels like. The thoughts of "maybe I am making the wrong choice...", etc... You being happy is NOT a wrong choice... You giving your kids a better life is not a wrong choice. I am sure they want their "happy" mommy back.

 

Do you want to live feeling like a shell of a person longer then you already have? I don't and I know you don't neither. *hugs*

 

You can do it

[rocio]

Is that you in your avatar? You're so pretty!

 

I just think that these next 3 weeks are going to be some of the toughest you'll have to endure.. and then things will get better. Just think of how good it will be to have your freedom back. EVERYONE has the right to freedom without fear of violence and abuse.

[liquer]

yep, you are pretty. Don't turn to drink, it won't help and can only make things worse. I don't know your cirucmstances butwhy do you want to leave your husband?

[headunderwater]

Thanks everyone, Yes that was me. I changed my avi because I forgot this is a public forum and someone could see and tell DH.

 

Liquer- if you look a handful of posts down on this forum you will find my situation. I can't even give an abbreviated version here.

 

Angel baby- are u still in your home? PM me if u want.

 

UMAmberella- I actually had to stop plans. The decision to stop planning is the only thing that could quell the anxiety. I couldn't function. I am trying to get to the dr. on Friday for some anxiety help etc. Not easy though, I need my husband to watch all the kids.

[rocio]

UMAmberella- I actually had to stop plans. The decision to stop planning is the only thing that could quell the anxiety. I couldn't function. I am trying to get to the dr. on Friday for some anxiety help etc. Not easy though, I need my husband to watch all the kids.

 

That's understandable. I don't think I would ever have the courage to do it. But you've been through more than me and seem much stronger. You also seem very intelligent and I know you'll do the right thing.