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finally its over**now i'm dying inside


DGirl
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Hi all,

 

Well, some of you may know my situation and some may not. Long story short I have been with my husband a total of over 8 yrs, married for just over 1 yr. Our whole marriage feel like a fake. 4 months after the wedding I found a singles add my husband had posted for himself on line. I caught him in numerous lies, big and small. I have not trust for him whats so ever. So naturally I act like a B**ch toward him. I agreed to try to work it out. We have tried counseling and everything but i cant seem to get past it. I feel betrayed and violated. Besides the fact that he is soooooo financially unstable and I pay all the bills and take care of all the house hold chores and he comes and goes as he pleases. He is always out with his friends, drinking partying and doing god knows what!!!!

 

Anyway, we had discussed divorce but neither one of us seemed able to do it. So we kind of just put up with each other. Now we had another big fight on Sunday about the dumbest thing and we both agreed that this is it and its over. But we dont know where to begin. Neither one of us called a lawyer, made any arrangements to move out(well its my house so he's the one that needs to go). Its like we cant live with each other but we cant live without each other. As bad as I want him to leave its killing me! I have this empty feeling inside, I feel like I have a 5 ton weight on my heart!! WHY??? Look what I wrote about him.....he is useless, i'm better off alone! I'm alone all the time anyway. I guess I'm just looking for someone to tell me I'm doing the right thing here! Please help me!! I feel so alone and i dont know what to do!! I really have no one I can talk to about this, my family dont even know! We have no kids so I guess thats a good thing, but i just need to know I'm doing the right thing! Please anyone!!!! Say something cause i feel like i'm dying!!

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Well I think you are better off alone. The thing is you two have been together so long that it is kind of routine, and you feel like your whole life has been wripped away. It will take time to get over, and it won't be easy, but I think you will be happier once you start over. Good Luck. I hope it gets better and easier for you soon.

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Hi DGirl,

 

I had a really hard time letting go of my soon-to-be ex-husband. I knew what my life would be like if I stayed with him. It was familiar and it gave me a sense of security. We knew each other inside and out. Losing all of that is hard. Like mamarains13 said, you feel like your whole life is being ripped away.

 

You will start to feel better, but it will take time and effort. Like so many others have told me, keep busy, talk to people who will listen, and don't give in to despair. Feel free to message me if you'd like. Best wishes to you!

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