airbag11 Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 Howdy all! So I just got back into the dating thing after a looooong hiatus. I've been on a few dates that seemed encouraging, but I wasn't physically attracted to/felt there was a "spark" with any of the girls I've met...until now. I had a date with this wonderful gal I met on Match on Saturday. We talked straight for 3 hours until she had to leave for a girls day out with her pals. As we were about to part ways, we both said "so give me a call, ok?" which was funny. So here's where I need your help. I texted her afterwards, the following being a short transcript: me: Hey! I had a great time today! her: Hey! Me too! me: so when can I see you again? her: haha next week! That's good right? I thought it was until a buddy of mine was like "dude, * * * are you doing!?!" He's all about the don't text/ask her out until 1-2 days after thing. I see no point to that crap--I liked this girl and thought we hit it off well, might as well ask her out again right? The same buddy of mine then proceeded to go into a whole thing about she could just have said "next week" as a courtesy. I was then "advised" to wait until at least tuesday before I cement plans. Sigh...should I follow? Dating is weird... Link to comment
Mustang Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 As much as I hate "playing the game" you have to kind of make out that you're not THAT interested early on. Be aloof and mysterious. I know, it's annoying when you like someone but don't go in full steam ahead or you'll scare her away. Link to comment
Incognito_Squito Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 Eh. The "good" girls don't like that waiting game. Its dumb, and its exactly that - a game. I'd say, if she said "next week!" then that's an open door to go ahead and make plans. Especially girls you meet online - they have a goal in mind and are keen on cutting through all the bull that normally comes along with dating. Just call her - I would say the day after your date, give her a call and cement the plans. Link to comment
jojesse Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 Female opinion here: A bit of mystery is always good. There are many reasons for this, including 1. you don't want to scare her off and 2. you don't want to come off as needy/over-eager. Set up a date for next weekend but definitely don't call her until Monday/Tuesday. It's just good manners to leave the person with the gift of missing you. Link to comment
Incognito_Squito Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 Female opinion here: A bit of mystery is always good. There are many reasons for this, including 1. you don't want to scare her off and 2. you don't want to come off as needy/over-eager. Set up a date for next weekend but definitely don't call her until Monday/Tuesday. It's just good manners to leave the person with the gift of missing you. Hm. I find this interesting. Not to thread-jack, but what are your opinions on the subject if the girl asks you to call her the very next day after the date? Or specifically says that she doesn't like to be kept waiting by the phone? Link to comment
kuiks8 Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 I think it was sweet that you texted her to say you had a good time etc but now back off a bit...wait a couple to few days before you make plans... Link to comment
jojesse Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 Hm. I find this interesting. Not to thread-jack, but what are your opinions on the subject if the girl asks you to call her the very next day after the date? Or specifically says that she doesn't like to be kept waiting by the phone? If she asks you to call, it means she's interested so I would definitely stop the game-playing there. You wouldn't want her to think that you're not at the same level as she is, at which point she might withdraw completely and move on to someone else. Link to comment
airbag11 Posted April 14, 2008 Author Share Posted April 14, 2008 Hmm...this is all very interesting. Human nature is just so funny. I do understand the idea of giving someone the opportunity to miss you though--that actually is a wonderful way of phrasing it. Yet, it's like we're denying each other the attention we so eagerly crave and want. It looks like the majority answer though, is that I've done ok, i.e. haven't broken the rules too bad, and that my continuing course of action should be to call her in a few days. Am I correct? I dunno, like I've said I've been on a few dates with other girls, but I particularly like this one...I just don't want to screw it up! Link to comment
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