Should I stay or should I go?

[Ikatu]

Hey everyone,

 

Just a warning, I know it's long, but I have some details I need to illustrate in order to get the point accross.

 

I've been seeing my girlfriend for about 3 months now, and for the most part, everything has been pretty smooth up till a week or two ago.

 

First, I wasn't feeling to well about two weeks ago. I was experiencing nasty headaches and was having quite a hard time falling asleep; however, this wasn't as a result of the relationship, it's just something that I get every now and then. The effect of my headaches and lack of sleep made me not really myself: I would talk less and wasn't generally as happy as I normally was. She noticed this, and took it personally even though I told her the reason, but she just wouldn't believe me. After much convincing, I became me again and things were good.

 

Now, this past Thursday night, she slept over at my place, although, she didn't seem to be herself. Normally, we get close, which leads into intimacy. That night however, it didn't happen. The very second she came over she just wanted to sleep rather than do anything at all. Ok fine, I can live with that, maybe she was really tired. Normally, mornings lead to intimacy too (we both have pretty high sex drives). So anyways, we both woke up the next morning, and I proceeded to get things started by kissing her, touching and the whole bit. She just got up and took a shower, leaving me hanging. Oh, and get this, she barely kissed me the previous night, and even in the morning.

 

Ok, so fast forward to last night. I went to her place, sat next to her on her couch, put my arm around her, tried to kiss her, and all she gave me was her cheek.... That isn't like her at all. So I tried to ignore it and play it cool. I was trying to be close to her, and she just wouldn't respond to anything. So anyways, we went to bed, sex didn't happen cos she told me she just wanted to sleep. Woke up, got ready, got on the train (halfway, she gets off for work, and I change trains to head to my place), and while we got off the train, I tried to kiss her, she gave cheek yet again, then I tried to give her a hug at least, and guess what? She said "I can't, I have to get to work." She has to go to work? First of all, she doesn't start work until 30 minutes after she is off the train, and takes 5 min for her to get to her work. Second, a hug takes all of 2 WHOLE seconds! Needless to say, I'm kinda pissed. I don't even say bye, and I get on my train. I'm pretty frustrated to say the least.

 

Worst part about it is, I have no problems breaking up with her since I think she's losing interest, but we have a trip planned in June and it's already paid for... Believe it or not, she called me a month ago telling me of a flight discount, and like a moron, I said yes. I should have seen this coming. In a way, this is one reason that I'm a bit reluctant to break it off.

 

Any thoughts of what I should do? I think I'm gonna talk to her about it tonight, but I just don't know how to start it off.

 

](*,)

[kylee]

I don't think you should hold onto the relationship just because there is some trip coming up. I think that would be selfish to both of you. I do think that you should break up with her softly and maybe still stay in contact. Who knows maybe you can give away your spot to a friend of hers or maybe she's willing to give it up for you...either way if you handle it maturely you can always talk these things out i think the trip is a minor setback. When breaking up with her i would start with some of the good memories you've had and tell her that you don't want to lose a special part of your life you just think that she is losing interest in the relationship and you want to make her happy. She may even surprise you and tell you she doesn't want to break up and you can work through it.

best of luck