drankmysoco Posted February 10, 2008 Share Posted February 10, 2008 Ok so me and my ex have been broken up for about 2 months now. During those two months we have been on and off talking and seeing each other. We have hooked up about 7 times since. But the day after she would always ignore me. Now i know she is "seeing" a guy right now. Now i haven't contacted her in 3 days. I want her to be my valentines, so Im wondering should I ignore her until the day before and do something nice to her, like leave flowers on her car (she will know its me) (now im scared that once i do that and call her the next day she will ignore my call) or should i pretend like ive moved on and not even call her or contact her in any way during valentines; Cause the ball is in her court right now, she is the one who is confused and not sure if she can be with me. Link to comment
Crazyaboutdogs Posted February 10, 2008 Share Posted February 10, 2008 She keeps hooking up with you and then ignoring you right after...she is seeing someone else....those are two very good reasons NOT to do anything for her for Valentine's Day or any other day for that matter...those are two very good reasons to initiate NC and ignore her if she contacts you for another hookup session. Link to comment
drankmysoco Posted February 10, 2008 Author Share Posted February 10, 2008 I know thats what i should be doing, its just so hard when theres feelings involved.. And i can never say no when she calls.. even tho i know i shouldn't meet up with her when she does call... And the fact that our "hook ups" do happen it makes it that much harder the day after when she ignores me. Now im sounding really needy right now, but it was the exact opposite during the relation ship. She was the needy one talking about having kids with me ect. She would get upset when i would dodge those conversations about love and our future ect. Now the game is reversed and Im the needy one. Link to comment
lonely83 Posted February 10, 2008 Share Posted February 10, 2008 I'm in a similar ish position, see my other threads for more detail - I came accross this thread earlier this evening have a look see what you think; lonely83 Link to comment
drankmysoco Posted February 10, 2008 Author Share Posted February 10, 2008 wotgorilla ye your positions sounds very familiar. I almost left her 2 times, and every time i almost did she would start crying and would start talking suicidal. I mean she would get so upset, i would feel bad and i would never follow up with me breaking up with her , or taking a break. Now look at me, and what hurts even more is that how easily she moved on, or so she makes it appear. Last time i was with her she was talking about our fun moments we've had ect. I would always think im making progress when we would meet up, but never did. Because the morning after the process would start all over again. I know I need to work on myself right now, but its hard when all your thinking about is her. And your right, before i do something stupid like call her ill come here instead. Link to comment
Crazyaboutdogs Posted February 10, 2008 Share Posted February 10, 2008 She's a manipulator and control freak...classic behaviours 1) push pull games 2) silent treatment 3) threatening suicide if you leave 4) excessive clinginess during the relationship. She is trouble and you are better off without her. Link to comment
drankmysoco Posted February 10, 2008 Author Share Posted February 10, 2008 She's a manipulator and control freak...classic behaviours 1) push pull games 2) silent treatment 3) threatening suicide if you leave 4) excessive clinginess during the relationship. She is trouble and you are better off without her. Its funny you say that cause she called me a control freak because i would always ask her where she is. Now id ask that only because she has lied to me in the past about what she would do, and id have to pull teeth to get the truth out of her. It happened numerous times where we would argue about it because she would lie to me about a little thing, multiple times, where it got to the point where i couldnt trust her, and id start asking what she was doing ect, and she said im a control freak, which i know isnt true, i tried explaining to her why i ask those questions, but she just wouldn't get it threw her head. I guess i just need to do the NC. Play her game back , when she calls dont pick up, call her a day after and ask her what she wanted. I dont kno if that will push her more away or not. Its going to be hard. Link to comment
Crazyaboutdogs Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 Don't do NC or LC to play a game with her...do it to save your sanity. She is no good, leave her be. It is clear she doesn't take responsibility for her behaviours and twists it around to you...that's also classic manipulator/control freak behaviour. Link to comment
drankmysoco Posted February 11, 2008 Author Share Posted February 11, 2008 hmm, i never thought about it that way, but i can see now how she rly is a control freak. Link to comment
lonely83 Posted February 16, 2008 Share Posted February 16, 2008 How are things going/working out drankmysoco? lonely83 Link to comment
drankmysoco Posted February 17, 2008 Author Share Posted February 17, 2008 I dont know. read this post that i made, a new one. Link to comment
Ami Pelletier Posted February 17, 2008 Share Posted February 17, 2008 If i were her I'd love the flowers on my car. Even if you said something non-committal. Then you won't be shut down. Like "to a wonderful person i love having in my life." Link to comment
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