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Well, here's the deal: My girlfriend of five years and I broke up at the end of March this year. At first I was really in bad shape. Eventually, I got stronger, started dating and have been meeting several girls. Thing is, I can't get my ex off my mind. I thought I was doing fine for a couple months, but for the last few weeks, she has been on my mind a lot.


I have been strong and have not called her. She has been the one to always call me (except of course the first couple months when I called her all the time). One day I woke up and said I will not call her anymore, and I didn't. She ended up calling me every 2-3 weeks once I stopped calling. I started being mean to her when I answered her calls. I told her this is what you wanted, not what I wanted. I would hang up and she would call back a few weeks later. The last time we spoke was a couple weeks ago on a Thursday. She called me and the first words out of her mouth were "I miss you" (she had been drinking as usual when she calls me). I said I miss you too. We spoke for like 1/2 an hour. We made plans to go out the next day or on Saturday to a movie.

I called her on Friday and she didn't answer and I didn't leave a message. I called her on Saturday and she didn't answer, this time I text messaged her asking what time she wanted to see the movie at. She paged me back with an answer.

I then went to the gym to workout and when I got out I called my roommate who said my ex called there and said she couldn't make it because she was sick and tired. As soon as I got home I called her back and bithced her out. I said this is b.s. This is the 2nd time you've done this to me. I said don't ever call me again, next time you want to call me do us both a favor and don't. I called her some names and said next time you call I will call the cops and put a restraining order on you. I said have a good life, go to h*ll and I hung up. Her response was that she was sorry, but that she had to work that day an she didn't feel good.

Later that night at 1:30am she called me back and asked me if I was serious about me not wanting to hear from her again. I said I was. She said okay and we hung up.

Both times that she called me that day it sounded like she was somewhere loud. Maybe she had the t.v. on or maybe she was out.

Anyway, now I feel like crap. I am missing her a lot and am thinking that I may have made a mistake. I am missing her like I did when she first left. Now I feel like calling her and telling her how much I miss her, but I don't know if I should. My friend (the girls) tell me I shouldn't call her. My roommate (a guy) says I should call her. Guess I need some input. I would like to try and work things out with her again, but what was also frustrating is that everytime she calls me, although she says she misses me, she always says she "just wants us to be friends". I don't get it. Why does she call me, tell me she misses me and then says she just wants to be friends? She has said she is confused on what she wants, but that she doesn't want me completely out of her life. Says she is now going through what I went through in the beginning. I don't get it.

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I agree w/ hubman01 move on! no good here! My first (and thank goodness only) heartbreak took me almost 2 years to really get over (and we were only together 2-3 years!). Just keep going on, but be aware of your weakness still!


My normal formula is X=amount of time dated 1/3X=amount of time to get over a serious love... of course there are factors that change this formula.


SO I figure you got about 11 more months of really having to fight against contacting her, but by Christmas next year you'll be totally healed!

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