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Should I end an unhealthy friendship ???


wyo1234
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I have been friends with a co-worker of the opposite sex for about five months now. About two months ago, I thought I was receiving signals from her that she was interested in me. I asked her if she wanted to start seeing one another and she said no.

 

For a few weeks, we were a little unconfortable around each other, but things soon got back to normal. I really care about this individual and enjoy spending time with her and was more than willing to remain friends.

 

However latetly, I've felt as though she has gone out of her way to flirt with guys and talk about friendships with guys in front of me knowing that I have feelings for her. Obviously. I'm being a bit jealous which I understand. But I feel like she is going overboard to be hurtful to me.

 

I have recently caught her a few lies. I have also found out that at work she had some innapropriate social contacts with clients (we are probation officers). These contacts are damaging to our office and her credibility and the respect of her co-workers is now on the line.

 

She talks about doing things with me but when it comes time to actually do it, she is busy, or a friend is coming to town or there is a really good television show on.

 

I care about this person but she has shown me very little respect and has been acting immature. I don't know if it is worth it to try to work anything out with her or not. I'm not very conifdent that she has the ability to change her ways. I'm tired of being hurt and confused. Should I end the friendship or try to work it out???

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If you think it would benefit you to end your friendship, then feel free. But, if you think her excuses are truly legit, then maybe you should believe her and see where things go. Just don't give up. Maybe she is doing those things in front of you to make you upset, but then again, maybe you are just starting to notice these things because you're insecure about where you stand right now after being rejected.

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hey there wyo1234

 

firstly, id just like to welcome you to Enotalone. it sounds like your in a very bumpy friendship with this girl. It actually isnt really a friendship anymore. friends, be there attraction or not, should always consider the other's feelings and respect them. she is obviously not doing this.

 

both vlcm999 and Cid are right, this is all your decision, but if you know your going to get hurt if the friendship proceeds, then end it. i think you know your not getting treated the way you should, and she's not being fair to you. My advice would be to end the relationship, but try to avoid rivalry. sometimes these things have a tendency to turn into competition. keep your cool, and go about your job as if she wasnt even there. she'll soon realise you know better, and she'll move on.

 

i know its a pain when people turn sour out of the blue. just try and keep your head about things and you'll be fine

 

best of luck to you

 

*+*Materia_Goddess*+*

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