im so weird.

[bobsiesprincess]

i feel like im two different people.

 

one part of me is soooo lonely and is dying for human interaction, but the last 3 arrangements ive had with people ive cancelled.

 

im dying to get out of the house then as soon as i do i get panicky and want to be back safe in my room.

 

im kind of getting scared of people and going out. i feel like every1 will be talking about me and looking at me. and ill be in pieces when i meet the ex.

 

im feeling myself getting more and more depressed and introverted. i no longer talk to my friends about how im feeling because i know they are sick of it/dont understand it. i dont particuarly feel like going out because i know people are sick of me and my face tripping me but i cant help it. the first few weeks my friends were really there for me but people are no longer getting in touch and keeping me busy like they did at the start. i know they have their own lives but i feel like i just mean nothing to anyone.

 

this break up has made me lose all confidence. the one person i could be 100% myself with rejected me and now i feel like im not good enough for anyone. i dont know how to act around new people anymore cos im so sure they wont like me. im so self conscious about my looks and stuff as well.

 

sorry for the moan, im just upset tonight, my grans really unwell and usually id turn to my ex but now i have no1

 

i just want more than anything to go back to the old happy, confident me. i wish this hadnt happened. im trying my hardest to pull myself out of this, but i cant.

[nikkers04]

I know how you feel with just wanting to stay at home...do me a favor...STOP CANCELING! I know life seems to suck but going out with friends really does make you feel better even if it doesn't the first couple of times...even if they can only get you to smile once...thats one more smile that will bring us one step closer to being ok.

[butterflyx0]

ugh, i agree. i'm crying right now, because my dad's friend just came over and was like, "I hate your ex boyfriend" and told me he saw him with all of his friends playing cards at another one of my dad's friends houses.

 

it's somewhat comforting that other people don't like him, and that he was on my side...but it just hurt to hear about my ex. and i *think* i just saw the ex and his best friend in his car, but I'm not sure.

 

this freaking sucks. I haven't cried in so long over this but today is so bad and I have a wedding rehearsal to go to tonight! i just want to be happy like he is!! why is that so much to ask?!

[HappyAsALark]

You have to pick yourself up though, no matter how hard it is. That is the only thing that is going to make you feel better. Sitting around feeling negative about yourself is not helping you.

 

You don't want to lose your friends, and no one wants to hang out with or talk to someone that is consistently down on themselves.

 

Pick your head up.