not being allowed to move on

[street]

After 5 months of being broken up after a 4 year relationship my ex I think is having regrets. It was her who broke up and she has even being seeing someone else for the last few months. The last month has been no contact until she emailed me last week..saying how much she misses me etc..

 

This put me in a spin, but I tried to ignore it as I was doing so well at moving on, anyway sat nite she phoned and left a drunken message on my answer phone saying how much she misses me and loves me!!!

 

Im being dragged back into the despair that I was in, I do still love her but im not sure we could get back together and im not sure that is what she wants..

 

What does she want from me?? I asked her this last week and she says she doesn't know!!

 

Im just going to ignore her I think and carry on moving on..but that love is still there and part of me still wants her!!!

[Gilgamesh]

Hello Street,

 

I believe I responded to one of your posts many months ago, when this all first happened.

 

Because of the simularities to my case, (4 years, aprox same time and she was the one to leave, no warning)

 

The circumstances may be alittle different, but you need to ask your self these questions:

 

Can you forgive her?

Can you trust her?

Do you still love her?

Do you think she really loves you?

has she asked for forgiveness and admitted doing wrong?

 

If you answer yes to those questions, then go for it, if not, then you may be facing more sorrow and heart break. You are in love with her, but you are really in love with who she was before she did these things to you, thats an image you have created of her in your mind, the person your in love with is who she was before all this happened.

 

so think about this real hard, before deciding if you want to risk going back to her.

 

It is possible she has realized what she lost, and has seen the error of her ways, thats what we would like to believe, but it could be, it just didnt work out with the other guy, and shes alone.

 

keep us posted

[street]

i do still love her, i could trust her..

 

she hasn't said she wants back in, i think she is still with this other bloke..

 

im just going to let her do the chasing and see where it goes..its because i have backed off and have shown im moving on that she is scared of losing me..

 

i don't want her as a friend..

 

will keep u posted

[qbert]

man, if you love her why do you even halfto ask what to do. do what ever it takes to make the both of you happy.

[Senna]

Jesus, if that was my ex telling me that l would be in her arms now. Your lucky l would do anything to be in your postion 4 years is along time l say see what she wants and see if you can work things out but take it slowly. Good luck

[qbert]

i agree Senna, just start hanging out agen, if she was worth spending 4 years of your life together yous must really love each other. what ever you deside to do good luck mate

 

blake

[street]

thanks people, its just she broke it off so i think she should be the one 2 suggest getting abck together, i don't want to chase her like i did when we first broke up..

 

will let her do the running for now..will keep u posted

[qbert]

nice thinking mate, just dont let her run too much or for to long or she may give up. i reckon you should keep incontact with her. hope it all go's well, sounds like youve done the right thing so far

 

Blake