He says he needs to know if i am the one for him....

[coolbeans0417]

My boyfriend of 3 years just wrote me an email saying that he wants some time apart to know if i am really the one for him but he says that he is not going to do anything with anyone else and that he still loves me and cares about me and that he hopes that one day he will marry me but he says that he HAS to do this. So the weekend went by and i didnt call him i didnt IM him i didnt talk to him whatsoever and then he IMed me and said o you cant talk to me now and he said that he wants to talk to me and just act like nothing is wrong. He was questioning me on what i did this weekend and he was just acting really weird. I am really confused and dont know what to do. Now he wants to talk to me more than we ever did before??? What should i do?

[Happy_Go_Lucky_Heb]

Hey. First up, I'd like to welcome you to enotalone on behalf of everyone too. I'm sure u've taken a nice step towards finding support and advice from many people of various ages from around the world which will be around for a while.

 

I think you should drop the confused part, that could be having an mental restriction on you to think. Clear your head a little, could you be just uneasy and jumpy about everything because of what your boyfriends doing right now. It's a bit hard to explain but sometimes when things happen you just begin to notice unecessary things and have uneasy thoughts about things.

 

There's so many possibilities and I don't want you to jump to conclusions yet a possible one is, he's confused about something and needs time to himself to discover who he really is. Or me, I miss her so much, we kind of have a long distance relationship is just we're still at school and it takes me 3 hours return on subway just to see her plus transfer time. When i'm not with her, the pain is so great sometimes i wonder if its worth it...

 

Another is that there could've been a misunderstanding somewhere, so in that case ask him if you have anything to do with this *thing* he's pulling because, you are a couple, and sometimes not only is it fair but you have to make decisions as one...

 

PS maybe the questions about the weekened was to make some converstation, that's what I do

 

Hope that helped

Happy Heb

[Renaissancelady]

I bet our relationship must sound very strange to you all, but I think it's beautiful, and I now have some problems. I'm not an American, but my boyfriend is, and he met me last year when I was 19, he 23. He is a philosophy major and was writing his first book at the start of our relationship. He is cultured, traditional, musculine, well-educated, kind and responsible gentleman. We just had met several times, then he found he liked me and I liked him too. Then in Nov., we met each other in his apartment, and he said that I made him so hot, and we slept but didn't have sex, cuz I was not ready then. In Dec. , he went back the the U.S., and since then we began to send e-mails. He doesn't talk much and is low-key, but we have a lot in common. He only sends me e-mails, see our relationship is a year and he still sends e-mails to me only once a month telling me that he thinks about me often and miss me and just what's he's been doing recently, most of them were not long. I sent him many e-mails telling him how much I like him and my life in here, he appreciates them but just doesn't reply my hot e-mails! I'm very hungry for his loving letters or e-mails but they are so hard to get!

I don't know what to do, I think that this is just his style, I know. His longest relationship was a year before me, and he seems decided to be serious in our relationship given that we've not seen each other for about a year and it seems there are 2 years till we meet again, I think he maybe think that he loves me and wants to work on it, but just his way is sort of strange and I can't get enough from him. Last month, I sent him a wonderful e-mail for his birthday, and I think he might at least reply to let me know that he 's happy with it and write a loving letter in return, but he's done nothing till now. What's wrong with him??? Isn't he too mature spiritually?