Very inconsiderate sister

[Raincheck]

My sister is very inconsidereate.

 

She's been with her boyfriend for 2 years, and even though he's a really nice and cool guy, THEIR relationship is affecting MY HOME. We live in a small two bedroom apartment, me, my mom and sister. But now my sister, over the last year has picked up the habit of having him sleeping over at least 3 times a week!! It's annoying. They take up all of the living room sometimes by eating, turning off the lights and watching movies loudly, or they take up my mom's room which my sister shares. It's also mesier when he's around. It's just an uncomfortable situation. And I understand that he lives over an hour away, but still. Once a week that he sleeps over and once a week that she sleeps over his house, is more than enough. The rest fo the time they can commute or spend a day or two without seeing one anohter, big woop!!!

 

I told her how I feel about this hundreds of times and she keeps saying "oh, I understand" but NEVER CHANGES ANYTHING! She says she doesnt know what to tell him when he says, "Oh, don't worry...I'll sleep over tonight"

[BellaDonna]

What does your mom think of all of this?

 

Maybe it would have more of an impact if it came from your mom too, and not just you. Then she might be more considerate.

 

She says she doesnt know what to tell him when he says, "Oh, don't worry...I'll sleep over tonight"

 

She needs to remind him that the 3 of you are already cramped in a small apartment and that she is not the only person who lives there, and out of consideration it's best that the sleepovers be kept to a minimum.

[Raincheck]

My mom likes him alot too. And it's not like she's 15, she's 21 and he's 23, so they are both young adults and able to do what they want, BUT NOT IN OUR HOUSE.

 

Since my mother likes him so much, she'll tell me "oh, I really don't want John sleeping over, it's just too much" but then when I tell my sister this, and she asks my mom, my mom will say "its not that...he can sleep over" and the whole thing is forgotten. My mom is on the fence about it.

 

But my sister is just inconsiderate, I keep telling her that....there are 3 adults in this small apartment, we dont need another one!!!!

[BellaDonna]

I think you need to keeping telling your sister until she gets the hint and takes it more seriously. I think you need to empower your mom to speak up a bit more -and to remind your mom that this is not anything personal against the boyfriend- but that it's not appropriate that you'd be inconvenienced and squished in like sardines, just because he wants to sleep over.

 

If that does not work, you may need to make a comment to the boyfriend yourself- not anything rude- just the truth. Wait for the right opportunity.

 

If it were me- I'd be so tempted to tell the guy that he spends so much time at my apartment that I was going to claim him as a dependent on my next tax return- but of course that would be rude.

 

Do you all pay rent? If so another approach would be to propose raising your sister's portion of the rent if she insists on having an extra person there that needs to be fed, use electricity and water, and take up space.

[Siriana]

Reconsider moving out.

You can do nothing.

Or find a bf and bring him 3 times a week on a sleep over. Ha! I wish I could see their faces if you've done that......for about a year. Or at least a friend! And be shure to be messy.